Essay from Chimezie Ihekuna


Chimezie Ihekuna

Mr. Ben, as he is fondly called, is poised to give humanity all he has to offer-values that give life a meaning. He is doing this continuously through the mechanism known as creative writing. Through painstaking efforts of gathering knowledge, this G.A.N.G (An acrostic that stands for Generally Appreciating Notable Genres) writer is aimed at making life worth its while to himself and those around him.

To depict this feat, he has written over twenty work titles-Fiction and non-fiction. Among those are his popular “Maya: Initiate 39”, “Saved By His Grace”, “11 Major Deceptions You Must Guard Against…”, “7 Mistakes Christians Make” and many others as unveiled in his blog He is a member of,, International Association of Aspiring Authors and his articles are showcased on, and other affiliate sites.

Based in Lagos, Nigeria, Mr. Ben enjoys reading, communicating with people and traveling.

Deception 2
It’s good to feel the “sweetness” of sex by engaging different people to it

Does the expression “variety is the spice of life” ring a bell to you? Of course, the sweetness of a food delicacy is due to a combination of carefully selected diet constituents in different compositions by an expert-driven preparation. Today, countries of the world have unequivocally outlined the fundamental human rights to their citizens. They have an essential common element, “freedom”. Citizens of the worlds’ recognized nations have over the years been abused by the same entities through various ‘visible’ outfits depicting and encouraging a sexual misuse of the word “freedom”.

A typical instance is the erotic movies that have become Hollywood’s blockbusters. These movies portray the need for engaging in practically deceptive acts, translated as expressions given in Deception 1. They encourage sexual freedom; a means of sexual gratification by seeking different believed-to-be competent individuals to the act of love making, irrespective of relationship status. The erotic movies watched by viewers had in a way succeeded by blindfolding them; believing without a doubt that sexual freedom improves one’s sexuality and enhances relationships. As a matter of fact, the characters used in these movies are made to paint make-believe situations by drifting towards having illicit affairs with other persons with or without the consent of their spouses and simultaneously maintaining a steady or fidelity-defined relationship with their spouse.

Is that really possible? Some will say ‘yes’ while others will say “No”. If you are for the former, then it can be inferred that there is a marriage in front of you and if you are not careful, the aftermath may not be interesting. “How?” A pertinent question! Interestingly, most of these characters in the movies are in their relationship experiencing not-encouraging issues as demise or “breakings”, divorce and estranged situations are realistically associated with their private lives. However, they have successfully spread the deceptive statement. “It’s good to feel the “sweetness” of sex by engaging different people to it” though their acting prowess. Obviously the impact this make-believe act has created in the personal lives of their fans is enormous, despite the conspicuously fabricated storylines.

Another typical instance is the extreme X-rated pornographic movies and magazines. Obscene images, torturing techniques and other dirty acts displayed by porn stars support sexual freedom. The Porn Industry has marketed itself as a respected phenomenon and drawn the interest of many people (races) to believing without a pinch of salt that sexual freedom pays. In various pornographic movies, a particular porn star must have “slept” with different people. To an extent, what has been painted is this: sexual freedom affords us the opportunity to improve our sexuality by having intricate sexual contacts with different people. What porn film makers fail to assert is what porn actors and actresses face in real-life situations, the shame, neglect, low self-esteem, drug and addiction, sexual mania situation, infidelity, insecurity, diseases and so on. In the same vein, the actors and actresses of most classic porn movies have influenced immensely the lifestyle of their fans, despite their “unreal moves” most of the stunts performed are choreographed, edited and concerned sex performers are usually on sex enhancing drugs. Unfortunately most of these stars are club girls, drug pushers, strippers, dancers, studs, and high school drop-outs.

The question “Generally, how have they influenced the lifestyle of movie viewers?” comes to focus. The answer is simply shown in relationship approach. Most people engage in relationships to sexually gratify themselves. Simply, they see relationships as means to sexually improving themselves; a practical usage of sexual freedom. What is meant to be a preparing ground for a life-long marriage is now used as a platform to selfishly satisfy sex urge. What do you expect? Honestly, sexual freedom is a mirage that realistically makes people see those they engage in relationships with as sex objects, that is, tools for gratification. In fact, sexual freedom realistically encourages infidelity, insecurity, diseases and so on amongst people who are in relationships and married. Hence, the following statements can be deduced.

(1) Individuals who had engaged in failed ‘I love-you’ relationship were used as sex objects, tools for sexual gratification.
(2) A woman of infidelity is like a “semen receptacle” where men can deposit their God-given strength in, away and out of sight.
(3) An habitual fornicator will unequivocally become an adulterer or adulteress, if there are no genuine and thorough spiritual overhaul
(4) If proper caution is not exercised, the marriage between those who had engaged in failed ‘I-love-you’ relationship will continue as subsequent illicit affairs outside their matrimony either the man cheating on his wife or vice versa, both parties cheating on each other with or without man or the wife knowing.

Sexual freedom permits people to engage in various forms sexually dastard acts such as lesbianism, bestiality, homosexuality, bi-sexuality, anal sex and so on under the guise of overcoming boredom, anxiety, neglect by organizing money-spraying shows, parties and other social events incorporating these sexual forms thereby providing youngsters a preferred choice to practice. For convenience however, we are considering sexual intercourse. On the contrary, what sexual freedom has failed to recognize is that “sex” in the context of direct physical contact existing between a man and woman is a bond that creates a deep and lasting impression on both parties.
A situation where an individual had engaged in various failed ‘I-love-you’ relationships, how can he or she enjoy a good and steady relationship?

Recently a bosom friend of mine, a Kenyan, had been involved in many failed relationships. In fact, in her words, “I was used like a piece of disposable syringe to heal the prevailing sexual urge by my so-called ex-boyfriends”. Really, it all started when she took to being ardent viewers of porn movies. It so influenced her that she went with her friends to parties, clubs and other joints. (At the time, her parents were not living together. Though she lived with her father, she was always at home while her father is a business tycoon that travels round the world).

As she anticipated, a dashing young man asked her to go on a date with him. She agreed. He eventually became her first love. And as time progressed, they got to know each other better and planned for a future marital bliss. All went to jeopardy as she discovered that her so-called boyfriend has been flirting around with other young ladies and is merely used her as a mere sex object. Although she was heart-broken, her mind was set – to move on with her life. Unfortunately, owing to her naivety, she was tossed around like ‘a paper in the devil’s basket’ in her subsequent relationships.