Dramatic piece from DanaLynne Johnson


*Toy Law*

1 How was I supposed to know there was a law. The Bad Samaritan law? Whose bright idea was that? He should be here in this cell: not me. He beat his wife: not me. He endangered his own child: not me. All I did was listen. All I did was…all I did was witness a crime. I didn’t do anything. … Victoria? … Are you okay, Victoria? … Is Genesis okay? … I heard her crying: I heard her, Victoria. I wanted to pick her up. I wanted to…

2 Door’s open! I’ll be right there! I just got out of the shower! Did you bring Henry Weinhart? The game’s on ESPN! Damn! … Hey, can you turn up the volume? I can’t hear it in here! … Victoria? What did he accuse you of this time? … Did you burn his dinner? … Forget to do his laundry? You didn’t iron his shirts? … Hey, can you turn it up? I still can’t hear anything? … Come on, Victoria. Strike back. Matt?—I think that your name—didn’t anyone tell you that you don’t hit a girl? We don’t hit women. … Damn! … There’s my wallet … Did someone forget that bit of information? Where were you when that lesson was being learned by everybody else? … You must have thought they said trains when they passed out brains. … Damn you! Victoria? Hang in there. … Hey! Get me a glass and some ice! Thanks!

3 I didn’t hear anything? did you? … Are you sure? No, I didn’t hear anything. Where did you put the remote? … Hamm! That hits the spot! … Which game is this? The Lakers-Celtics game should be up in about ten minutes. … I didn’t hear anything. … Victoria? Genesis? … God damn you, Matt. … Nothing. I didn’t say anything.

4 I’m not a bad person. I pay my bills. I pay my taxes. I keep to myself. Most of the time, anyway. I want to throw something. But everything’s nailed down. Damn! … Someone came by an hour ago. … I don’t need a public defender: I didn’t do anything wrong! Fuck! I never laid a hand on him. I never even spoke to him. … Make me! Come on,: make me shut up! Fuck you! I’m fucking innocent!

5 Victoria’s here? Where’s Genesis? I’ll have to ask her. … I wish I could wash my face at least. Shave, maybe. Don’t want to look like Matt.

6 What the hell was she mad about? I didn’t do anything. I did not do any thing, Victoria. How can I be guilty of doing nothing? People do it every day. … I feel like in a cage. I’m in a cage, and the zoo visitors are all staring at me. I think they should experience life from this side. … God, you look awful, Victoria. Why did you come, anyway? Shouldn’t you wait until the marks fade? Shouldn’t you cover up your bruises? Makeup: you should wear makeup? Shouldn’t you? I think you should. Hey, do you know who won the game? … What are you so mad at? … Shouldn’t You take it out on Matt? He’s the one who putt those marks on your face, on your arms? … He didn’t touch Genesis, did he? … Thank God.

7 Hey! Did you put the beer in the fridge? I’ve got the pretzels. … What do you mean? … You called the police? On me? … Here. Here’s your beer! Get out!