A spirit in chains

The first day of winter… This cruel season came very early and cold this year. This could be known from the fact that people changed into warm clothes in the fall, put their hands in their pockets so that they wouldn’t get cold, and even though they tried to cover their faces with scarves, their noses turned red as if someone had pinched them. Everyone hurried to their warm house, but it was surprising that Hosiyat was selling bread near the schoolyard in such a cold weather. Usually, at this time, her friends would stay for extra training after the lesson. Hosiyat was also with them. However, these 2 months completely changed Hosiyat. She was not as cheerful as before, there was no joy on his face. All kinds of rumors spread in the school. Someone said that she had a mental illness, and someone said that her house burned down and that she needed money. But who is telling the truth is unlikely.

Sometimes, her classmates used to call her “Ms. bread” during class to make fun of her. Looking at this girl with a radiant face, it would not even cross her mind that she was a girl who used to be extravagantly dressed, stood out from her peers, and was difficult to find a match for. She had changed so much that comparing the Hosiyat 2 months ago with the current Hosiyat, one could feel the difference between the earth and the sky. Why did it happen? Can this little opportunity have such an impact on a person? It’s as if she’s on someone’s trail… She looks like Hosiyat, but in reality she’s like another girl. Time has passed since then. The sun and the moon took turns guarding. It has been 4 months since Hosiyat started selling bread. But until now, no one has seen a smile on her face. The lesson is over. Hosiyat’s best friend Bashorat asked her to stay. It is no exaggeration to say that Hosiyat was one of the best students of the 8th grade. However, now her studies have dropped, and it was not known whether she was in class or not. Now Hosiyat and Bashorat are sitting together. The prophecy did not know how to ask, the thought did not leave her that what she heard was true.

Finally she asked:

– Friend, Hosiyat, why are you so upset? You never did that before. What happened? Trust me, I won’t tell anyone.

Hosiyat was about to cry. With her eyes fixed on one point:

– What can I do? If I don’t change, who will change? I know, I know everything. What they say about me, what nicknames they gave me. But I am not silent. Do you know why?! Because it is better for me to suffer from mental illness and for our house to burn down than to lose my mother. After 1 week, dad is better than stepmom. are you listening I say better. Better!!!

Hosiyat was crying inside. Until now, she couldn’t laugh, and she couldn’t cry either. She just seemed numb before. Bashorat, who heard these words, could not help herself. Unknowingly, 1-2 years rolled down her face like a necklace. She thought about what to comfort her.

Bashorat thought that Hosiyat was left without a mother very early, that all stepmothers are bad, and that they torture their stepchildren.

That’s why Hosiyat sold bread in the cold. So, her stepmother forced her.

Hosiyat could barely contain herself. Until now, she never thought that she might lose her parents. They say that 15 days of the month are light and 15 days are dark. It turned out that now there are dark days in Hosiyat.

– Well, don’t cry, friend. It happens to everyone. God, may her place be in paradise. If you want, come to our house, my family will be happy.

Hosiyat wanted to answer at that moment, but something bitter got stuck in her throat.

It has been more than 20 days since this incident happened. I think Hosiyat’s life 20 days ago was much better than now. Because now Hosiyat is not studying at school. The money Hosiyat brought home was never enough for his stepmother.  Rumors spread that he was secretly saving some to escape, fueling his stepmother’s anger. She berated his father, ultimately convincing him to abandon Hosiyat at the orphanage. In some ways, her situation is better now than when she lived with her stepmother.

However, Hosiyat was completely cut off from this world. Only black clouds were drunkenly rioting in her sky. Her mother’s sudden death, the sufferings of her stepmother, the teasing of her classmates, the fact that she sold bread in the freezing cold, and even the fact that her own father abandoned her because she was a missing wife, flashed before her eyes like a movie.  She is afraid to watch this movie, he doesn’t have the courage, but no matter what she does, her soul is chained, no matter how hard she tries, she is doomed. Her only handful of crying pillows comforted her every night by stroking her head.

Tursunboyeva Nigora Abdumannob qizi was born on February 23, 2009, in  Uzbekistan. Currently, she is a 10th grade student at the  Is’hoqxon Ibrat Creativity School. She is proficient in writing poetry and stories and can freely speak in English, Russian,Uzbek and German. Her stories have been published in the prestigious Kenyan journal “Kenya Times” and in Germany’s “Raven Cage” journal her story “Family” was featured. Her poems have appeared in the book “Stars of the Knowledge Arena” and she has been honored with a medal. In the American anthology “The Voices of Uzbekistan,” under the title “Oʻzbegim Dilbandlari,” her poems “Armon,” “Bahorim,” and “Endi sheʼr yozmasman” have been published. And she is an active member of the World Writers and Artists  Working Group Juntos Por Las Letras.