———————————————————————

nightmare after nightmare

the holidays…

where some people

drown themselves

in nostalgia

where those of us

that grew up in

dysfunctional

families

get to relive nightmare

after nightmare

what i tend to think

about when the holidays

come around is my

father’s father

i never got to meet

him

he committed suicide

three years after my

father was born

as i have grown older

i can’t help but think

he was probably the

smartest man ever

to live

—————————————————————

sunk into the creases of existence

pride will kill

you faster than

any disease

i was told that

long before i

could understand

what it meant

fast forward to

a bad back, arthritis

head to toe, apathy

racing through the

veins and i’m pretty

sure i’m an expert

by now

the dreams of exploring

the world and becoming

a legend died in my

twenties

and before life

simply became

a battle between

bottles of lotion

and liquor

i had sunk into

the creases of

existence

laughing in the

shadows

pretending that any

of this had meaning

empty and broken

pride no longer exists

i suppose now it

is up to the disease

————————————————————————

that tempting myth

the bitter taste of defeat

the sad songs of christmas

always hit the hardest

love, that tempting myth

so many miles away

like water in a world

of concrete

and here comes the

neon of the season

joy wrapped up

in a bundle of

greed

these are the moments

where i wish i could

sleep more than four

hours a day

they tell me all these

things that will happen

when you die

i laugh

i tend to think nothing

will happen

and if it does

i won’t have much

say about it, being

dead and all

—————————————————————

chaos and bewilderment

a paper cut that won’t

stop bleeding

a sign that the end

is near

must be the most

beautiful time

of the year

hot enough on christmas

to be wearing shorts

i suppose this is the future

we have all been running

from

chaos and bewilderment

i believe that is a drink

i made by mistake in

my teenage years

i haven’t closed a bar

in a couple of decades

now

that probably held off

a disease or two

the sound of darlene love

will put me to sleep tonight

solitude on christmas never

felt right, just what i had

still time for that to change

but not as long as i would

like

—————————————————————-

where they came from

a buddy i used

to work with

said one night

that the problem

with the world is

men spend their

whole damn lives

trying to get back

in where they

came from

everyone laughed

and i took another

drag from a cigarette

i said dan, explain

this to me

i was a c-section

he laughed

and said hope you

won’t be lonely

forever

fucker…

J.J. Campbell (1976 – ?) is old enough to know better. He’s been widely published over the years, most recently at Disturb the Universe Magazine, The Beatnik Cowboy, Crossroads Magazine, The Rye Whiskey Review and Yellow Mama. You can find him most days at home in Ohio taking care of his disabled mother and betting on sports. Most people will say he’s okay at both, most days. He does still have a blog, evil delights, but rarely has the time to write on it. (https://evildelights.blogspot.com)