You made my life unhappy to the extent that my happiness relied on another. I’ve spent more time and energy on your existence than was healthy. I went round and round in circles with the pain. You took from me what was mine. Or was it really? And, yet, you took away even more. My dignity. I felt violated in the way no person should suffer. My pain was unyielding, fatiguing, wearing my spirit down. Wearisome, I tried to forgive. The heart couldn’t forget the pain. My coping skills to manage you weren’t up to par. I tried. I ignored you. I didn’t acknowledge you.

But, there you were with a false happy smile and I felt betrayed.

Life changes

You are no longer a threat

I have nothing to hold on to

but the pain you inflicted

I can release myself from the misery

now that you are a neutral party

You are real, but negated

No longer are you a stone wall keeping me back.

No longer are you an irritating pea in my shoe.

No longer are you an object of my unhappiness.

My happiness depends on me

As it always has

Truth be told

I was always happy

You were just a dark spot in the line of my vision

Now that you are gone

My sight is restored

Yet, the memory of the pain

needs to move to the periphery

You’re no longer the dartboard of my soul

Entrenched entangled

The false web is gone

Freedom still eludes me

I shall rest when you are truly dead

Leticia Garcia Bradford performs around the SF East Bay at open mics and readings.  She finds herself a poet, a playwright and  pharmacy techinician. She is the founder of the B Street Writers Collective in Hayward, CA. Check out her blog of her poems and stories atlgbradford.blogspot.com