Crazy Eye
They looked at each other, blank-eyed, after the delivery van drove off, outside.
What’s the matter. Why the look?
I told you already. I don’t like this.
Don’t like this? Don’t like what? The TV’s here, right? Look at it. There it is. What more do you need?
It still bothers me I never heard of the company you said you ordered it from.
What? Why? You said you were nervous it’d never get delivered ‘cause you never heard of the company. I could even see that, maybe. But—here it is. What’s the big deal now?
They gazed at the TV on the floor between them.
I don’t know, I—hey listen, I think anybody hit in the face with a name like the “Regulation TV set factory out West Bruce Toothpull” would think that’s fake.
Uh. Okay. So the name’s odd. But—here it is.
Yes, I know. But—oh, never mind.
No no no, wait. Here it is. It’s plugged in. It’s powered up. What were you going to say still bothers you? Come on.
Okay, okay. I almost think we shouldn’t have it, that it shouldn’t be here.
Why?
I guess because I—think its dirty—like something I can’t touch ‘cause I don’t know where its been!
Instant’s stunned silence, then, Jesus Christ, that’s crazy! How can that be?
Don’t pick at me now. You forced me to say that! I wasn’t going to say it, but you forced me—so don’t look at me that way!
Okay, okay—I didn’t mean—
Oh yes you did. I always know what you mean! You got me started now, so—shut up and listen! First, the name of the company. You see it anyplace on any paperwork we got?
I don’t know, maybe—I—
Never mind maybe. The answer is no! Next—did you see the van it came in?
Okay, sure. A big white van. So?
That’s the kind of van you always called a kidnapper van. Remember?
Huh? What—I never heard that term—kidnapper van. What is it?
Oh, again, a nice pat convenient answer. I swear, you’re so stubborn.
Stubborn? Really? When I’m simply honestly saying I don’t remember things the way you do? I just—just don’t know what a—kidnapper van, or whatever you said—I just say I don’t know what that is, and—how is that being stubborn?
Okay. Maybe not stubborn, but—what you’re admitting to can’t be true, because I can see and hear you as clear as a bell, telling me all about “kidnapper vans” way back when. Why have you decided to get your back up and lie about it to me, today?
Wait—hold it, this is going too damned far!
Really? No! I’llgrant you that liar may be just a hair too strong, maybe you’re just forcing yourself to believe you don’t remember to keep yourself clear of being an actual liar, but—
What? That’s crazy!
No, no! Never mind—pay attention! When you used that term back then, I asked you what a kidnapper van was, and you told me clear as day. You said—
No! Can’t possibly have happened! I’ve never heard of such a thing!
Hold it, don’t cut me off—yes you did, because you explained that a kidnapper van is a van of one blank color : mostly white or black—other colors are rare : with no windows in the sides or in the back door and no—
No! Can’t possibly have happened! I’ve never heard of such a thing!
DAMN it don’t talk over me! Uh—okay, a van with no lettering of any kind and even sometimes with blanked-out license plates, this all being so, so that—
No! Can’t possibly have happened! I’ve never heard of such a thing!
—the victim can be snatched, and thrown in the back there, and then with the doors locked the kidnappers can drive away to the secret site of their choice to do what they wish to the victim in secret, and—
No! Can’t possibly have happened! I’ve never heard of such a thing!
—and if even someone saw them grab the victim and take off, there’d be nothing unique about the vehicle to tell the police to look for—
No! Can’t possibly have happened! I’ve never heard of such a thing!
—and you capped all that off with some kidnappers even take the van to a scrap dealer for crushing, once they’ve used it in the kidnapping grab and—
No! Can’t possibly have happened! I’ve never heard of such a thing!
—then they can proceed with the rest of their plan for the use of the victim for this that or the other—and then you said—
No! Can’t possibly have happened! I’ve never heard of such a thing!
—you said that was all that there was to be known ‘bout a kidnapping van.
No! Can’t possibly have happened! I’ve never heard of such a thing!
But, the description I’ve just recounted, I got from you way back then!
No! No! I’ve never heard of such a thing! What are you—you are calling me a liar?
Uh—isn’t it possible you may just have forgotten what it is? That wouldn’t mean you are a liar. Perhaps a bit forgetful, but—
What?
—but no way could you be considered a liar. That is, if you claim to have simply forgot.
{wink}
What? NO! I did not forget, and am not a liar, both. Both things, and both, and—
Hold it HOLD it just one more thing—and that is why I fear this damned TV—I fear what may have been done to it—and what it may do to us in revenge if we let down our guard!
{crazy eye}
Step back—
{crazy eye}
Dear God!
Look down, up, away, and into straight into pierce probe prod and stab-b-b-b w’, the n say softly as humanly possible—Let’s talk about something else now, okay?
Okay sure. If you’ll admit you believe me.
—NO but I never no b-b-b-ut I it’s always but I this, and but I that—Let’s talk about something else I tell you say one damned more syllable—
Ah. Okay. Sure. I believe you.
Good. Deep silence in-tween in-tween, deep silence—both then turned and left the tense airless room after one pulled the plug on the no-name TV and pushed it into a corner. Over there in the corner it sits to this day under stuff come on top more and more and so under that stuff on top of it there, under it all, there it sits alone; the dark room