Mortality

I have the body of a twenty year old –
I keep it in the refrigerator for midnight snacks.
I was worried when I was told that I was in room 205 at the hospital –
When I checked in the room, I found out that it was someone else.
I don’t want to die with my boots on –
Because I don’t wear boots to bed.
I check the obituaries before I get out of bed –
If I am in them there is no reason to get out of bed.
I heard someone about my size and age had died on a bicycle –
I was worried until I remembered that I didn’t have a bike.
I want to die in my sleep like Uncle Fred –
Unlike the people in the house he burned down after blocking the doors.
I don’t want to die in the saddle –
So I avoid horses and tack shops.

Hospital

I volunteered at Legacy Meridian Park Medical Center (or as I thought of it, the hospital with too many names) for eleven years. My job was wheelchair jockey, or as I called it, unpaid escort, pusher or roll model (nudge – nudge, wink-wink).

Usually the job was very easy, so when I was asked if I got a lot of exercise, I responded “Not since the wheel was invented. When I had to carry people on my back, that was exercise.” Sometimes I was challenged to roll the extremely obese uphill. I got to see a lot of overweight people because they are more likely to be hospitalized than others. My last partner was an eighty – something year old woman, so I tried to take the more difficult cases. It didn’t require much strength, but driving two wheelchairs at once, occupied or not, required a lot of coordination. It wasn’t necessary, but I liked to show off. Getting people with leg injuries into jacked up pickups was difficult. In one case, which no doubt broke the rules, I picked up a light person and put him in the seat. In return for my paltry labors, I got a free breakfast.

This was a cruel prank, but I enjoyed handing off a very heavy bag to an old, 100 pound woman and watching her almost hit the floor.

One good thing about the job was that one rarely saw the same person twice, so I could use my short list of jokes repeatedly. Best gag – pretending that the patient was deplaning. “Please extinguish all smoking material and return your seatback to a full upright position. Thank you for riding Legacy chairs.”

Some events were not humorous to those involved, but presented slapstick visuals. One fellow’s urine sac which was connected to his catheter fell of his leg while I was pushing him. I didn’t catch on until I heard him screaming. Another patient had his oxygen tube caught in the wheel of his chair. He was cool, but his daughter freaked. Last and least, was the projectile vomiting. It looked much like the gag vomiting in TV or movie comedies.

Of course there were heart-rending events as well, but they belong on the “Short Sadness Site.”

Hiking Etiquette, Glossary And Wisdom

Affirmation – Are we here yet? The answer is always yes.
Are we there yet? – If said subject to capital punishment.
Bad hike – One or more die.
Bleeding – Probably not fatal unless in pints.
Bonus – To leader for bringing back more hikers than taken out.
Boots – Wear them.
Brace Yourself – Admonition to put on knee protectors
Cell phone – Don’t depend on. Useful in emergencies and to irritate other hikers.
Cheryl Strayed / Wild Rules:
Try out your boots for a few miles, before a thousand mile hike.
Try out your pack for a few miles before a thousand mile hike.
Cliffs – Where you find out if you have any serious enemies.
Clothes – Take clothes for all possible weather. Layers good. In good weather, flaunt it if you’ve got it.
Dehydration – Slayer of kidneys. See water.
Deja hike – Hey, I’ve been on a hike with trees and views before.
Emergency equipment – Find a list and follow it.
Falls – Try to avoid, but you won’t.
Feet – Something that hurts.
Five Mile Hike – The new ten mile hike.
Flower Identification – They are smaller than trees.
Gaiters – Misspelling of gators.
Gatorade – Bring for your gators.
Good Hike – Nobody dies.
GPS – If your group has one, you will know exactly where you are. If you have more than one, you will have no idea.
High heeled sneakers – Good song, bad for hiking.
Kneesy – Hike that is easy on the knees.
Knife edge – terrain where I won’t be found.
Leader talk:
We are almost at lunch – Means we aren’t.
It is just around the bend – And 20 others.
There is no uphill after lunch – There is.
The steam crossings were easy when I scouted – They aren’t now.
It is a five mile level hike – It could be
Lost hiker – Someone who is visiting from Wisconsin who starts hiking alone an hour before sunset with a dead cell phone, clothes too cold for the night, sandals, no water, who sometime after dark decides the best way to get back is to go off trail to a cliff that he can’t see.
Mountain – Something that you can fall off screaming to your death.
Nature – Our enemy. It blocks views, sends coyotes and raccoons into our backyards and slugs into our gardens. We must win the battle against nature at all cost.
Pathological – The Decision to stay on the trail rather than bushwhacking.
Poles or walking sticks – Equipment used to ensure that the face is broken rather than wrists when one falls or for stabbing the hiker behind. Rule of the trail – the hiker behind is at fault.
Poison Oak – Leaves of three, let me be. Definitely, do not use as toilet paper.
Potty Stop Men – Where men trade five years of life for speedier peeing (at least until the prostate acts up). Prowess is judged by a jury of their pee-ers.
Potty Stop Women – It is a mystery.
Rain – Get used to it.
Road to Trail Ratio – A low ratio of time driving to time hiking is good.
Rocky Road – An ice cream flavor, or a route that is hard on the feet.
Saw, Rule Of: It is better to have a saw and not need it, than to need a saw and not have it. Applies to many things other than saws.
Scrambles – Hands in use. Watch out for the hiker in front rolling down on top of you.
Shrinkage – Happens to guys in cold streams. Hike leaders allowed to lose up to 10% of hikers before being penalized.
Ticks – An excuse to get naked and have someone inspect you. You could get lucky in more ways than one.
Toenails – Trim them to prevent downhill pain. To be safe, have them surgically removed.
Trail – Note similarity in spelling to trial. Stay on it.
Tree Identification – You guessed it. They are bigger than flowers.
Vacuum – Synonym for sweep
Vegetation blocking the trail – A weapon used to injure the hiker behind.
Volcanic Eruption – Avoid.
Walkie-Talkies – Great devices for communicating on group hikes, which perform perfectly until you need them in an emergency.
Water – Bring lots. Drink same.
Weather – Will not be what you expected.
Wildlife – At our age after a ten mile hike?

Search and Rescue

If you would like to meet some of the fine people from Search and Rescue and listen to some of their amusing stories about the fools that they encounter in their line of work, here are some ways to help you do that. I’ve attempted to use English as well as American so this advice will work on both sides of the Atlantic.
Start your hike close to dark.
Make certain that you know nothing about the route that you take, except that the trail is narrow and that there are dangerous drop offs.
Take a youth or dog that is likely to wander off.
Bring a cell (mobile) phone but be sure that it either doesn’t get reception or that the battery is dead. Don’t take a flashlight (torch).
It helps to wear a thin undershirt, sandals and shorts when the temperature is projected to be below freezing at night.
Food or water? Of course not.
Avoid maps and GPS.
When it is dark and you are scared of being lost, immediately leave the trail. If you are lucky, you will fall down a bank and be disabled.
You will probably make the news the next day with the Search and Rescue crew. Good idea – decide the day before whether you want to go for a scruffy and disheveled look or you want to be glamoro(u)s.

Personals

W4M – Boyfriend wanted
Me – 300 pounds BBW. HSV positive. Fore kids with five differint fathers.
U – 6’2” to 6’5” athletec, edjucated perfessional generous$ gentleman to take me shopping n diner, then well see how it goes. Gross picture deleted.

M4M – ISO Str8 married guy
Kik me for a good time.
M4W – Let me rock your world
Look at this. obscene picture deleted.

M4W – Looking for a discrete affair
Handsome professional man wanting to get a little on the side. Helps if you are married too. obscene picture deleted.

W4M – Want late night fun.
I have low self esteem. Please demean me and my children. Call me a while __ on me. Must be respectful non-smoker and DDF.

MW4W – Unicorn wanted
Successful, happy couple looking for a third to complete our marriage. Must be beautiful, 25-32, and willing to clean house. Fake picture deleted

W4MMMM – Hope to do this soon
Open to anybody to do anything. Do not be concerned about my husband with the gun; it is only for my security. He’ll just be watching and filming. Fake picture deleted

M4W – ISO Cougar
Buy me dinner and we’ll see how thing go.

W4M Ready to party go fast now
Bring party favors. You’ll need to give me a credit card to be able to verify your identity.

MW4MW Full Swap
Must be young, attractive & fit. Bring Tina and Air Blast for PnP. Non-smokers only.

W4M – Missed connection. I saw you at the checkout at Albertsons. You look like you are about 30 with long blond hair. You were dressed in black pants and white shirt. You were with a woman about your age and three children. You were buying food, tampons and panties. I was in the next lane over, the short, chubby woman in red, and didn’t get a chance to talk to you even though we exchanged glances. Are you single? If yes, I would like to bear your children. 10 year old picture of someone else deleted.

The Ten Commandments in the 21st Century

A team of defense lawyers has given a modern interpretation of the Ten Commandments.

1. I am the Lord Your God. / You shall have no other gods before me.
Response – One of these is not even a commandment. Note that it says “before”, therefore having other gods equal is acceptable, so if you choose to have Morduk, Justin Bieber, money, a Corvette, Angelina Jolie, or the Portland Trailblazers as equal gods, you meet the letter of the law.
2.You shall not make yourself an idol.
Response – We can’t imagine that applies to reality shows like “American Idol” or movie studios, the major producers of idols.
3.Do not take the name of the Lord in vain.
Response – “In vain”, what does that even mean? Other parts of the book imply that we can’t speak or know his/her name, and that there are many names for god, so how can we possibly apply this commandment? We don’t think that “Gosh” or “Golly” are offenses.
4.Remember the Sabbath and keep it holy.
Response – If some say it is Saturday and some say it is Sunday, it would be completely unfair to apply this to either day. Anyway, how do we keep it holy? Does watching football and drinking beer count if football is a co-equal god?
5.Honor your father and mother.
Response – Visits on Christmas or Thanksgiving should be adequate.
6.You shall not kill/murder.
Response – If you are commanded by secular authority, such as the military, this commandment is rendered void. Police are exempt. If somebody threatens you in any way, say looking at you in an intimidating way, lethal response is considered self-defense.
7.You shall not steal.
Response – Office supplies should be considered de minimus. Borrowing and not returning does not constitute stealing.
8.You shall not commit adultery.
Response – If you did not enjoy it or agree to counseling afterwards, it should not be held against you
9.You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.
Response – Your truth may not be his/her truth.
10.You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife. / You shall not covet anything that belongs to your neighbor.
Response – The first half is unenforceable because it is not gender neutral. Defining the difference between “liking” and “coveting” is a slippery slope no one is qualified to define.

Thespian

My first acting role was as Santa Claus in a grade school production. Because we had no theatre department, I was chosen for the lead because I finished my homework quickly. The “plot” was a trip around the globe showing how different countries celebrated Christmas. My one mistake was going to the countries out of order, but recovered with aplomb by blaming the reindeer. Oddly, no talent scout offered me a big studio contract.

My second role came about by an odd sequence of events. I was giving my friend Gary a ride to his starring part in a Portland Parks production of “Little Abner”. The director spotted another friend, the handsome Kim, and I, and said “Scraggs” (relatives of the beauteous Daisy Mae). The comic strip / movie / Broadway Scraggs were known to be lazy and ugly, so in my case it was type casting. Our song was “If I Had My Druthers”, which was OK because it didn’t require the ability to sing, which neither of us had. I got some praise as one of the handsome, muscular topless Dogpatch boys after drinking Yokumberry Tonic. Remembering the good parts is a good thing. Afterwards, the show was televised on local TV, which confirmed my lack of singing ability (this partly inspired “Nose” which is in Short Humour and Literally Stories).

When we moved to Marin California after leaving a job that I hated, I became a decent docent at China Camp, which involved storytelling about a Chinese shrimping settlement. It is a fascinating story involving history, culture and business, but not too funny.

I became a programmer and seller of actuarial software, which was quite a leap in that I couldn’t program or sell, but at least it gave me something to do beyond being a house husband. For several years I worked on advertising and running booths at industry meetings for my software, and if that isn’t show biz, I don’t know what is.

When Windows replaced DOS, I was unwilling or unable to revise the programs, and thought that we had enough money to retire.

During one of the three productions of “Tony And Tina’s Wedding” that I saw Tina chose me from the audience to make Tony jealous. I wasn’t very good at looking happy to have the rather large Tina sit on my lap.
Now I “act” indirectly (my lovely and talented editor thought that “at one remove” was too obscure). My alter ego, Duke Hanley gets to do the things that I’m too smart, too incompetent, or too fearful to do in many of the stories that I write.

North&Gales Creek Hike

 
Gales Creek is in the eastern foothills of the Coast Range in western Oregon USA.  By mountain standards, the Coast Range is very modest and have never been known to brag like the Rockies have as in “Rocky Mountain High” as performed by the late John Denver aka Deutschendorf.
 
An aside – a lesson from John Denver – don’t sing a song about a woman you are going to divorce (Annie).
 
The hike was led by a man, but we usually have women leaders in which case we are Ms. Led or Miss Led, depending on which camp you are in. 
 
As always, we got a hike description before the hike.  It listed two creek crossings.  We thought we’d have to cross them through the water, but each had a bridge.  Cleary the description should have been abridged.
 
A woman asked about a tree that was broken off about five feet (1.5 meters) from its base.  I said that I was stumped.
 
This was an easy hike for me because I am usually the designated whiner and complainer.  For this hike I was usurped by a former lawyer.  Maybe he was courting my approval.
 
The four of us in our car opted to skip the no-price extra three mile (five kilometers?) and several hundred feet (less than several hundred meters) add-on, so we didn’t get as high as they did.
 
Nobody died so it was a good hike.

What’s Wrong With The Left

 
Many parts of my body either hurt or don’t work, but the left is really bad.
 
My left shoulder has been diagnosed with five problems, which on a good day, I can remember:  floating bodies (sounds like a mystery or war novel), calcification, bone spur, degenerative joint disease and arthritis.  Granted, there may be some overlap here.  There are times when it is quite painful.  At least these are signs of a life poorly lived.
 
Left arm – practically useless.  I can catch with it a little and sometimes hold things.  It is weaker than the right.  Attempts to write, throw or bat lefty are comical.
 
The orthopedic guys told me that one leg is shorter than the other, which is probably why I habitually walk in circles.
 
I shovel and kick right footed.  Throwing or batting with either foot doesn’t work and I’ve had plenty of left foot and knee pain.  An X-Ray showed severe to advanced arthritis and an old fracture to my kneecap.  Knee pain has reduced me to using a walker on a few days.
 
My high blood pressure is related to the left-leaning heart.
 
My left eye is inferior to the right – both are abysmal.  With powerful lenses my sight can be corrected to near blind.
 
According to a vast oversimplification of a Wikipedia article, the right side of the brain is more action/emotional oriented and the left side is more caution/analytic oriented.  Hard to pick a winner or loser here, particularly since the left brain controls the right side of the body and vice versa.
 
Whichever part of the brain does what; neither side can help me remember all the leftist problems over the years.
 
The right isn’t that great either, but that is a story for another time.  I’ve got plenty wrong with both sides.

All of these week attempts at humo(u)r have appeared in Short Humour.

Brian Michael Barbeito is a Canadian writer and photographer. Recent work appears at The Notre Dame Review. 

Spirit of a Place, Spirit of a Thing (Artist Statement)

In an off handed remark during an interview, U.G. Krishnamurti, called by some an anti-guru, and by himself, ‘Something like a philosopher,’ said that he once thought he could sense the spirit of a place. But then he brushed it off through words and body language. It didn’t fit in with his philosophy and message. But I resonated with his statement anyhow, because I had always felt that I could feel the spirit of a place and also a thing. Old town, lake still and wide. City street, carnival game vendor and prizes. Bee. Spider. Flower. Vine. Ridge. Summit. Stone. Petal. Stream. Sun. Cloud. Bird and dusk, horizon and dawn. Lock, denoting love, affixed to lonesome bridge alone in the rain. Artifacts. Areas. Some saturnine and some sanguine. Hundreds of places and things, their spirit, against reason and logic, somehow speaking out, not with language of course, but calling out nevertheless. Semantics and nomenclature could argue what spirit means. Is it the atmosphere, the daemon, the angel, the area, the vibration, the feeling? Is it physical, metaphysical, true and there, or purely imaginary and projected? Difficult to know conclusively. But there is something I think in all that mise- en-scene, and so on the rural footpaths and metropolitan worlds also, I try and photograph it and also write about it, this spirit of a place and spirit of a thing.

Grateful

He’s anxiously reading about,

The life expectancy,

Of Jack Russell Terriers,

And discovering,

Unique and incredible,

Stories of resilience,

He’s feeling so grateful,

To have London,

In his life.

Taylor Dibbert is a widely published writer, journalist, and poet. He’s author of the Peace Corps memoir “Fiesta of Sunset,” and the forthcoming poetry collection “Home Again.”

THE EMERGENCE OF BAKERY PRODUCTS AND THEIR TYPES

Masharipova Bakhor Ixtiyor

2-A student of Food Technology, Faculty of Chemical Technology Karakalpak State University named after Berdak

Abstract: this article shows in detail the history of the emergence of bakery products, the main types and varieties of bread and bakery products.

Keywords: Bread Festival, bakery products, rye bread made from cedar and elan flour.

Bread is one of the most popular and widely consumed products in the world. Therefore, it is not surprising that he has his own holiday — World Bread Day (World Bread Day), this holiday is celebrated every year on October 16.   The holiday was established in 2006. The choice of date is due to the fact that on October 16, 1945, the United Nations Food and Agriculture Organization was created, which is engaged in solving problems in agriculture and production.

In every country in the world, bread and bakery products are always eaten in love. He is given the most honorable place on the table, bread was and remains a symbol of life. The history of bread goes back several millennia. According to scientific research, the first bakery products appeared about 8 thousand years ago. The first yeast bread was made in Egypt. 

In addition, in ancient times, white bread was consumed by people of the upper class, and black and gray bread was considered the food of the poor. It was only in the 20th century that rye and whole grain bread became known about its benefits and nutritional value, which became even more popular. 

Today’s Holiday, World Bread Day, is one reason to draw the attention of the general public to the problems of hunger, poverty and malnutrition in the world. Therefore, traditionally, on World Bread Day, many countries hold various bakery exhibitions, meetings of chefs, bakers and confectioners, fairs, master classes, folk walks, as well as free bread distribution to those in need, charity events.  People will be able not only to taste different varieties and types of bread and bakery products, but also to get acquainted with how bread appeared, history and traditions, what it was made of, how it was baked, etc.

THE MAIN TYPES AND VARIETIES OF BREAD AND BAKERY PRODUCTS

The range of products of the bakery industry consists of bread, buns, pore and bakery products, as well as varieties of local and therapeutic dietary bakery products. According to the commodity classification of bread and bakery products, they are divided into types, varieties and varieties. Types of bakery products are combined with the type of flour used in their preparation. There are such types of bread as wheat, rye, wheat-rye and rye-wheat.

Bread clay is determined by the grade of flour used in baking bread. Wheat bread is made from high, grade I and II, “Uzbekistan” and wheat flour, and rye bread is made from elanma, sidirma and jaydari flour. There are simple and improved varieties of bread according to the recipe. The bread variety combines a number of signs. These are the type of bread, the chili, the baking method (in a mold or tagdone), the shape of the product (buns, batons, wraps), the method of delivery to the consumer (pulled or sold in granules), etc. 

The assortment of Non-bun products consists of several hundred varieties. Rye bread made from rye flour. Rye bread made from Jaydari flour is produced with mold or tagdone, by pulling or by grading. In addition to ordinary rye bread, fermented (red) rye bread is made from such flour, enhanced decoction rye bread with the addition of spices, rye bread “Moscow”, 80% Rye rye flour, 15% II grade wheat flour and Red Rye, “Borodino” breads are also prepared by adding sugar, patoka and spices.

Rye bread made from Sidirma and elanma flour. This group includes not only bakery products made from rye flour varieties, but also prepared by replacing part of them with wheat flour. Elanma and sidirma rye from the flours themselves, rye bread is produced molded or tagdoned, pulled or sold in grains. From a mixture of Sidirma rye and “Uzbek” wheat flour, “Darman” bread with mold and tagdon, which is sold either by grain, Ukrainian bread (20-80% sidirma rye and 80-20% jaydari wheat flour), Uraina fresh bread (20-80% sifted rye flour and 80-20% second-grade wheat flour) is produced. In the same group again “Pahlavon” bread, which is made from Cedar rye and first-grade wheat flour, 5% fermented agan malt, 7% sugar, 3% vegetable oil, 1% cumin; sidirma rye flour and second grade wheat flour, 5% fermented malt, 10% sugar and 1.5% cumin, which can be prepared “President” bread; 80% sidirma rye flour and 15% “Uzbekistan” grade wheat flour, 5% fermented malt, 9% sugar and 0.5% spice “Tangoq bread”, 90% Elma rye flour and 10% first grade wheat flour, 2% Patoka tagdon, which can be prepared by adding Nani; It includes “Riga” bread, which is prepared with the addition of 85% sifted rye flour, 10% first-grade wheat flour, 5% non-fermented rye malt and 0.4% spice, etc.

Rye-wheat and wheat-rye bread made from rye flour. Rye-wheat is made from 60% rye and 40% wheat rye flour with mold or tagdone, pulled or sold by grain, and wheat-rye bread is made from 60% wheat and 40% Rye rye flour. Rye-wheat decoction bread is also prepared by adding 5% fermented rye malt.

Wheat bread. Wheat bread refers to bread baked in a mold or tagdon, pulled or sold in granules, made from wheat flour of jaydari, “Uzbekistan”, I, II and higher grades. Wheat bread is produced in different varieties. For example, from jaydari wheat flour, breads are made that are sold with simple molds and tagdons, pulling or grading. Bread “Zabaykalsk” is made from wheat flour of 50%  and 50% of second-grade. From wheat flour of the second grade, ordinary bread (molded or tagdoned), “Ukrainian palyanitsa” (tagdon), “Kiev arnaunati” (tagdon), white bread (molded or tagdon) and others are produced. From wheat flour” Uzbekistan “is produced bread, which is sold by mold or by grain, and” peasant ” grain bread with tagdons.

From wheat flour of the first variety, ordinary bread (with a mold or tagdon), home bread (tagdon), milk bread, “Saratov kalachi”, “Ukrainian palyanitsa”, Belarusian bread, city bread, white bread, etc. are produced. High-grade wheat flour is made from ordinary molded and tagdoned, raisin bread, milk bread, “Saratov kalachi”, “floral” bread, etc.

In subsequent years, the bakery industry produces white bread from wheat flour of higher, first and second grades. In comparison with ordinary wheat bread, the recipe for this bread differs in an excess (1.5 %) of the amount of pressed yeast. From this, the porosity of this bread should be 2-3% higher than that of ordinary bread.

Buns products. Granular bakery products with different shapes. This group includes batons, buns, saikas, robes, wrap aces, calachs, etc. Batons made from wheat flour of higher, first and second varieties are oblong, with a blunt or sharp shape at the ends. According to the type of products, there are several cuts on the transverse of the surface. The cuts on the surface of some batons are located along the length. The buns have a round or oblong shape with cuts located parallel on the surface. In cooking, due to the dense placement of dough, the wool of the saikas is without a shell. In the recipe for batons, buns, saikas and other buns products 100 kilos of flour includes less than 7% fat and sugar. To the recipe of some varieties of buns products, for example, in ordinary and urban batons, there will be no fat1i and sugar.

“Shirmoy” bread buns products. This group includes all types of non-bun products, the recipe of which contains more than 7% fat and sugar compared to 100 k of flour. (“Shirmoy” bakery products are divided into ordinary bakery, amateur products, simple and shaped “Viborg” bakery. Ordinary bakery products are of the first grade, and amateur and “Viborg” bakery products are made from high-grade wheat flour. The degree of bakery of these varieties differs in that 100 k of sugar, 7 k of cow’s fat and 90 pieces (3.5 k) of eggs are added to ordinary bakery, 17 k of sugar, 13 k of cow’s fat, 220 eggs (8.8 kg) and 4.2 g of vanillin; 20 k of sugar, 2 k of patoka, 7 k of cow’s); 25 k of sugar, 2 k of patoca, 10 k of cow fat, 100 eggs (4 k), 5 g of vanillin and 1 k of powdered sugar (for sprinkling on the surface) are placed in the formative “Viborg” bakery. From each of the above varieties of bakery, it is possible to prepare dozens of products that differ in shape.

REFERENCES:

1. Muzaffar Vasiyev,”technology of bakery products”. “Generation of the new century”, 2009

2.Shamuradov T.R. and so on. Repair and installation of technological equipment for the production of confectionery, non-buns and pasta: a tutorial for professional colleges. – T.: “East”, 2007. – 192 p.

THE IMPORTANCE OF THE CONCEPT OF RECIDIVISM IN THE SCIENCE OF CRIMINAL LAW

Karakalpak State University

2nd year student of the Faculty of law

          Annotation: in this article, we will highlight the impact of crime on the education of a person in the construction of civil society in our country, its maturation as a perfect person, and the consequences of repeated crimes are mentioned. Among other things, one of the nuances that is relevant today is highlighted about recidivism and is highlighted by comparing the type of recidivism in the Criminal Code of foreign countries with the Criminal Code of our country.          

 Keywords: recidivism crime, civil society, civil society, dangerous, extremely dangerous recidivist. 

It is clear to all of us that the upbringing of a person in the construction of a civil society, its maturation as a perfect person is significant in all respects. Educating a generation that is mature both physically and mentally requires a lot of attention and hard work, above all. In the case of all kinds of crimes that occur in our society, the upbringing of a person has its effect on the fact that he becomes a mature person in every possible way. Among these, one of the crimes that is relevant today is recidivism. 

The fact that a person deliberately commits a new crime after being convicted of a previously intentional crime is recognized as a recidivistic crime. In cases where a person who has committed a crime similar to a previously convicted crime, separately specified in the Criminal Code, the intentional Commission of a new crime by a person convicted of other articles of a special part of the Criminal Code is recognized as a dangerous recidivist crime.

To commit a deliberate new crime, in which a sentence of imprisonment can be imposed for a period of not less than five years, namely:

a) the commission of a very serious crime by a person who has previously been sentenced for a very serious crime or for a serious crime twice and sentenced to imprisonment for a period of not less than five years for each of them;

b) the commission of a serious crime by a person who has been sentenced to imprisonment for serious or very serious crimes for a period of not less than five years each, regardless of whether he was previously convicted twice for a serious crime or before-after, is recognized as an extremely dangerous recidivistic crime.

With the judgment of the court, a person can be considered an extremely  dangerous recidivist. At the time of the resolution of the issue of finding a person as an extremely dangerous recidivist, his conviction in the judgments of the courts of other states can also be taken into account.

Recidivism crimes are characterized by the fact that as a form of committing several crimes, the guilty person commits a new crime after being convicted of a previously intentional crime. It is a common or common recidivist crime based on the following two characters: intentional Commission of a new crime; the conviction of a person for a previously intentional crime.

In the norms of the special part of the Criminal Code, recidivism is recognized as a sign that the crime is associated with a dangerous and extremely dangerous recidivism and is assessed by the composition of the crime.The question of considering a person as a dangerous recidivist is not decided by the court, but on the grounds established by the law itself, the person is a dangerous recidivist.  The person should be found in the process of being charged by the bodies of his investigation as a dangerous recidivist. Because the commission of a crime by a dangerous recidivist is a characteristic sign of a number of crimes and leads to the application of more serious penalties]. For this reason, this situation should be indicated by the preliminary investigation body when it is involved in participation as an accused in a criminal case, and later this should also be reflected in the descriptive part of the court sentence. The rules apply for the removal of grounds for finding a dangerous recidivism in other cases, such as both the removal and deletion of conviction in relation to a dangerous recidivist crime, and the responsibility or exemption from punishment for a crime committed by a person earlier on purpose. Committing a repeated crime or committing a new intentional crime after being convicted of committing a previous intentional crime is not considered a punitive case in the following cases: if the term of criminal prosecution for a crime committed for the first time has passed; if the conviction was removed or extinguished in accordance with the established procedure; or if the liability for criminal acts committed earlier was canceled by law; 65, 66, 66-1 of the Criminal Code. 68, 69, 70, 71, 76-in the event that a person, according to his articles, has been released from criminal liability and punishment for a crime he has committed before. This situation applies not only to ordinary recidivism, but also to all other types of recidivism, among which there is a dangerous and extremely dangerous recidivism crime, since common signs belonging to ordinary recidivism crime are also characteristic of them. “If the guilty person is removed by Amnesty or pardon from the convicted person for the intentional murder committed before him, if yohud is canceled or removed in accordance with the procedure established by law, as well as if by the time of committing the crime of homicide the fans of bringing him to justice for the crimes committed before him have passed, the extremely dangerous recidivism is considered to be one of the most severe forms of committing several crimes. They include the appointment of imprisonment as punishment and imprisonment for a period of not less than five years.

Such a basis arises only in the presence of one of the following options for recidivism:

– the commission of a very serious crime by a person who has previously been sentenced for a very serious crime and sentenced to imprisonment for a period of not less than five years;

– the commission of a very serious crime by a person who was previously sentenced to two serious crimes and sentenced to imprisonment for a period of not less than five years for each of them;

– the commission of a serious crime by a person who was previously sentenced to two sentences for a serious crime and each of them was sentenced to imprisonment for a period of not less than five years;

When we studied the experience of some foreign countries on the issue of committing several crimes and introducing a sentence for them, we witnessed that in countries such as Spain, Japan, Germany this issue was also regulated within the framework of the section on punishment in criminal law, and in countries such as Russia, Kazakhstan, Belarus, together with punishment, within the framework of the section on  Below we will consider the specifics of the legislation of these states on the appointment of penalties for several crimes with a comparative-analysis.

In accordance with the federal law of the Russian Federation of December 8, 2003, the commission of a repeated crime as a form of several crimes is excluded from the Criminal Code.  Currently, a set of crimes and recidivism are recognized as forms of several crimes. Chapter 10 of the Criminal Code of the Russian Federation is called “the appointment of punishment”, in which the procedure for the appointment of punishment in a separate case for any crime is established independently.  That is, in the presence of mitigating circumstances (Article 62), the appointment of a punishment for a crime even lighter than specified in the law (Article 64), the appointment of a punishment for crimes that are not complete (article 66); the appointment of a punishment for a crime committed in participation (Article 67); the appointment of a punishment for a recidic crime (Article 68); 

An analysis of the Spanish Criminal Code shows that there are two forms of several crimes: crime totals and recidivism. The chapter on the rules for the appointment of punishment will address the totality of crimes.  In accordance with Article 73 of this JK, the total of crimes is understood as the commission by the guilty of two or more crimes or socially dangerous acts.  The Spanish Criminal Code does not provide for the rules for the appointment of a single penalty in the event of the commission of two or more crimes by a person.  In these cases, according to Article 73 of the Criminal Code, punishments are assigned for joint execution.  If one or another punishment cannot be performed together, they are performed independently in turn from heavy to light in sequence.

Article 76 of the Spanish Criminal Code establishes the maximum limit for the imposition of penalties on the aggregate of crimes.  The punishment imposed on the aggregate of crimes should not exceed three times the most severe punishment. Maximum limit in the following cases: 

if a person is convicted of two or more crimes, and for one of them a penalty of imprisonment of up to 20 years is established, then 25 years; 

if a person is convicted of two or more crimes and for one of them is provided for a sentence of imprisonment of more than 20 years, it is 30 years. 

Article 77 of the Spanish Criminal Code speaks of the appointment of a penalty for the ideal total of crimes.  The rule in this article is about “committing two or more offenses in one act”, that is, the crimes are applied to the ideal totality. In this case, the assigned uzil-kesil punishment arises from the punishment imposed for the severity of the crimes committed, and the punishment in this case should be lighter than the appointment of a separate punishment for crimes.

Proceeding from this, we can say that the punishment imposed by the Spanish criminal law on the ideal total of crimes is light in relation to the punishment imposed on the real set of crimes. 

The Japanese Criminal Code lists two types of committing several crimes: a set of crimes and a recidivist crime.  Chapter 9 of the criminal code is devoted to the set of crimes.  In accordance with Article 45 of the Criminal Code, a set of crimes is the commission of several crimes by a person for whom a court decision has not yet been made.  Article 54 of the Japanese Criminal Code gives the concept of the ideal total of crimes, and according to this article “if one act falls into several criminal structures, or the act is a means of committing a crime, or its consequence, and coincides with the composition of another crime, the deviation of the penalties provided for by law is assigned.”

Chapter 9 of the Criminal Code establishes the rules for the appointment of penalties for the totality of crimes. According to him, for the most serious crime, which is part of the totality of crimes, the method of applying a more severe punishment and methods of compensating for punishments are used. Aspects related to the commission of several crimes and the appointment of penalties for them in the Federal Republic of Germany are given in Chapter 3 of the third section of the Criminal Code, which is called “penalties for several violations of laws.”  According to paragraph 52 of this chapter, “if one or a similar act violates several criminal laws many times one law, one penalty is applied.”  The analysis of the content of this paragraph shows that its content is not about the commission of several crimes under the Criminal Code of the Federal Republic of Germany, but about the violation of several laws or one law several times. 

If several criminal laws are violated, a punishment is imposed by the established law. The punishment cannot be lighter in this than in other applicable laws. In this case, we are talking about the ideal set of crimes.  In Germany, the ideal set of crimes is considered as a single crime, and one main punishment is assigned to this single crime. 

As a conclusion, I can say that, for example, it is necessary to master the positive side, as the Spanish Criminal Code establishes a separate procedure for imposing punishment for recidivism. After all, the ideal totality of crimes and the degree of social danger of the real totality of crimes differ from each other. It would also be appropriate if a separate procedure for imposing punishment was established for a recidivist crime.

        References: 

Criminal Code of the Republic of Uzbekistan

Sharh to the Criminal Code of the Republic of Uzbekistan

       Musical Memories                 

Cars are for crying. I’m not sure if it’s the nostalgic lyrics of the songs pouring out of the radio, or the time alone in a confined space that push the tears out of me. Maybe both. But, a silent, tuneless car ride is empty, somehow. My right hand auto-pilots to the radio as I nestle into the driver’s seat. Sometimes I wonder if I choose to listen to songs that will stir up the sadness in my guts. Music connects me to all the dead people. And to the living, missing people.

I don’t think I consciously choose songs to elicit my tears. Music naturally makes me  feel something. Wakes me up. Disturbs memories. I know I’m not alone with the music. Melodies. Lyrics. They stir everyone differently.

In my office, where the Bluetooth speaker is only quiet when my phone rings, the ladies humor me, and try to sing along as Gene Kelly Radio delivers the songs of my childhood. Dad filled our house with show tunes, all day, every day. I smile. A lot. But Tea for Two makes the tears fall as I shuffle ball change, shuffle hop step across terra cotta tiles, cherishing memories of Dad’s fake soft-shoe as he and I performed in front of the full-length bathroom mirror. I can still hear his perfect pitch voice and see his eyes twinkle beneath his wild tangle of eyebrows as he sang Oh What a Beautiful Mornin’ through the magical days of my childhood and beyond.

Halfway home on the turnpike last week, I touched the XM radio classic rock icon on the stereo screen. The Eagles’ Tequila Sunrise was just ending, and I heard the unmistakable guitar riff of The Beatles’ Revolution. I didn’t pick this song. The DJ did. Eight words into John’s iconic voice, my eyes spilled tears. I never know when it will happen. I had never been much of a crier. Maybe I cry in the car because I don’t want to do it in front of anyone.

            We played mostly Beatles at Jeffie’s funeral in San Francisco. It’s been six and a half years since my oldest brother left us. It still feels impossible. He went to sleep on a Thursday and never woke up on Friday. I’ll never know what to do with it. It’s pain that doesn’t leave.

            We connected through music. And many other things. But the songs are the glue. They stick to the memories. Keep them alive.

            While my brother, Jim and his acoustic guitar sang me to sleep with Me and Julio Down by the Schoolyard and Sweet Baby James, Jeffie introduced me to Pousette-Dart Band and 10cc. He got a mile long lemon-yellow Cadillac with black leather seats when he was seventeen. I was ten. At that moment in time, I’m not sure which I loved more: my big brother, his new used car, its smooth creased worn-in seats, or the 8-track radio that blasted all my new favorite songs. He took me for rides just so we could belt out I hope that it’s only Amnesia, believe me I’m sick but not insane… at the top of our lungs. I could only see out the windshield if I sat bent-kneed with my sneakered feet stacked under my butt. I took for granted the fact that he let me play the song as many times as I wanted. Summer swirled my brown mane across my face as it came in the windows. I didn’t miss a word, though, as I scooped long strands of hair out of my mouth.

            Forty-five years later, I play Amnesia, loudly and mostly with a smile. It depends on the day. Sometimes I cry through it. Sometimes I belt it out. Loud and out of tune. But it makes me feel close to my brother. The songs connect the memories so they can stay in my brain. I don’t ever want to lose them. So, I keep playing them. Even if they take up too much space for new music I could enjoy.

Stuck in music of the past keeps me closer to my best memories. Better times. Easier times. Less sad times. Months after losing him, I allowed myself to climb the spiral wooden stairs to Jeffie’s attic bedroom in my parent’s house. I knew exactly where to find them. His box of records sat, unchanged, in the back corner of the cedar closet with the low wooden door.

I felt ten again as my fingers walked over the top edge of each record, advancing them enough to see the name and art work on the well-worn covers. The Beatles, Steely Dan, Dan Fogelberg, Jethro Tull, England Dan and John Ford Coley, David Bowie, Chicago, James Taylor, Cat Stevens, Joni Mitchell, Nicolette Larson. Maybe I’ll be musically stuck in the 70s forever. Maybe the calm of that era that pulses through me keeps me from longing for modern music.

Music flows through our lives all day, every day. My husband, Brian has opened my cemented musical tastes to boatloads of new artists. With my heels still dug into John Denver’s boots, I admit to feeling musically enlightened. Even enthralled by Phish, ALO, the Grateful Dead, the Foo Fighters, Nine Inch Nails and Goose. I can listen to Pink Floyd. They’re not loud or offensive as I had always assumed. And I don’t have to be stoned to enjoy them. As I had also assumed.

I think I’ll make two saved playlists on my new car stereo: Songs for Crying and Songs Not for Crying.

The car sob-sessions are short-lived and cathartic. The nostalgia of the music fills me up like the chocolate soft serve of my childhood.