PROBLEMS ARISING IN THE PROCESS OF DIGITAL TRANSFORMATION AND STRATEGIES FOR THEIR SOLUTION
Olimova Muslima Odiljon qizi
Andijan State Institute of Mechanical Engineering,
Faculty of Intelligent Control and Computer Systems,
Student of the Information Systems and Technologies Department

Abstract:
This scientific thesis explores strategies for addressing problems in the process of digital transformation.
Keywords: Global economy, transformation, ecosystems, internet, platforms.

Digital transformation is a key theme in the global economy, yet what it truly means for established companies continues to puzzle both academics and practitioners. Here, we identify three main tensions at the core of digital transformation—products, platforms, firms, ecosystems, people, tools—and describe their underlying economics, driving forces, and counterforces. These tensions help frame the strategic alternatives for global companies. Overall, we argue that digital transformation is not an objective state but a strategic choice among various options made by leaders.

Digital transformation has become a vital topic of global strategy as born-digital firms like Google, Booking.com, Alibaba, and Amazon—as well as billion-dollar startups like Uber, Pinduoduo, Airbnb, and TikTok—have dominated collective imagination. Many of these digital reinventions of traditional industries, which often resist global boundaries, have led to the widespread belief that “digital transformation changes everything.” Officials are warned: “Disrupt or be disrupted.” This has led some to believe that digital transformation is establishing an entirely new world order. More data, connectivity, and digital intelligence are expected to eliminate global boundaries and reinforce new industrial frameworks.

However, a closer look at established firms undergoing digital transformation reveals a more complex story. For instance, Danish shipping company Maersk uses blockchain not to reinvent itself, but to perform its existing job—delivering goods more efficiently worldwide. Dutch beverage company Heineken uses digital transformation to better interact with customers, create products, and compete, yet still brews beer and delivers it by truck (Furr, Garlandt, and Shipilov, 2021). Even in digitally dominant industries such as media and travel, traditional firms continue to coexist—and even thrive—alongside digital disruptors: for example, The New York Times and Huffington Post continue to coexist.

Today’s rapid technological advancement is revolutionizing the work environment across all sectors. Even traditional organizations are experimenting with cloud analytics, human digital connectivity, sensor technology, and smart devices. This digital transformation compels companies to rethink not only their technology use but also their core models for creating and capturing value.

Shifting to digital, platform-based business models is often not easy, as it introduces a host of challenges that may be entirely new to many corporations. This research aims to understand the digital transformation process in traditional industry settings through a single qualitative case study. It focuses particularly on the challenges an organization might face during digital transformation and the digital strategies that can be employed to advance and benefit from it.

This study offers two theoretical contributions:

1. A new foundation for understanding the problems of digital transformation
2. A detailed description of the digital transformation process and the different management tools applied at various stages of the transformation

These contributions are also practically significant, as they can be used to assess and plan digital transformation processes. The empirical findings of this study suggest that current digital strategy literature may focus excessively on individual transformative digital initiatives, often overlooking the importance of digitizing traditional business processes to build a solid foundation for digital innovation.

Furthermore, existing literature places heavy emphasis on internal change problems, whereas in real-world cases, the most significant and challenging issues lie within the organization’s rigid institutional environment.

References:

1. Farkhod Mulaydinov. Digital Economy Is A Guarantee Of Government And Society Development. Ilkogretim Online, 2021; 20(3): 144–1479.
2. Yuldashev U.A. Use of Video Lesson Creative Technologies in the Process of Electronic Education. Scientific-Methodical Journal – T 2021.
3. Saidov Jasur Doniyor o‘g‘li, Saydullo Payzievich Allayorov, Said Xalilovich Islikov. Criteria for Assessing Professional Competence in Creating Databases. Scientific Progress. 2021. №1. URL: Andijan 2024.
   https://cyberleninka.ru/article/n/ma’lumotlar-omborini-yaratish-bo’yicha-kasbiy-kompetentligini-baholash-mezonlari (Accessed: 02.06.2022).
4. http://tsue.uz/uz/raqamli-iqtisodiyot-yangi-ozbekiston-taraqqiyotining-yangi-davri/
5. Abdullayev M., Saidahror G., & Ayupov R. (2020). Digital Economy – A Pressing Direction in Personnel Training. Archive of Scientific Research, 1(23).

Born on August 7, 2007, she is a student at Andijan State Institute of Engineering in the Faculty of “Intelligent Control and Computer Systems,” majoring in Information Systems and Technologies. Despite her young age, she is a talented programmer, writer, and youth leader who has achieved numerous accomplishments.

She is the founder of Muslima Academy, through which she leads thousands of young people toward knowledge, technology, and global opportunities. As the Uzbekistan ambassador of the Wakelet community, she actively contributes to the development of international scientific cooperation.

As a result of her academic research, she is the author of numerous articles, theses, and books. Her works are currently sold in over 30 countries, and she has signed international contracts with several foreign publishing houses. She has made a significant impact on the development of more than 1,000 young people.

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Dear Mother!

You’re the one and only light,
Ever circling, pure and bright.
Like a song that feels just right—
Mother, Mother, dearest light!

Kindness lives inside your soul,
Your bright smile can make us whole.
You are beauty’s purest role—
Mother, Mother, heart and soul!

May your years become a tale,
Stand through life, strong without fail.
May your name in love prevail—
Mother, Mother, without veil!

May your love not fade away,
May your name forever stay.
Let no mother feel dismay—
Mother, Mother, every day!

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Are You Truly Happy with Wealth?

Your proud stance and graceful frame,
Bring the hearts that know you flame.
But parents bore your life and name—
Are you truly happy with wealth?

You now look down on the poor,
For money’s sake, you ask for more.
But don’t forget your inner core—
Are you truly happy with wealth?

Your home’s a palace, they declare,
And call you “rich,” with loving care.
But charm and grace are rarely there—
Are you truly happy with wealth?

You built a fortune, grand and wide,
You see the people, but with pride.
Your conscience now you try to hide—
Are you truly happy with wealth?

Shoxrukh Fayzulla o‘g‘li Dusmatov lives in Gurlan district of Khorezm region. He was born on October 23, 2003, in Gurlan.
He graduated from Secondary School No. 2 in Gurlan district.
Currently, he is a student at the Urgench branch of Tashkent Medical Academy.

The Importance of Foreign Languages in Our Lives!

The 21st century is the age of science, technology, and information. In today’s globalizing world, every individual must work on self-development, grow intellectually, and — most importantly — learn foreign languages.

But what exactly does language give us? Why should we learn a new language?
Let’s explore the key reasons behind it.

Nowadays, millions of people are learning foreign languages — especially English, Russian, Korean, Arabic, Chinese, and Japanese. Take English, for example: mastering this one language allows you to communicate freely almost anywhere in the world, participate in international seminars, gain financial independence, and — in short — keep pace with the world. Today, most global news, scientific articles, and educational content are published primarily in English. Of course, translations may follow later — but what if too much time has passed by then?

By learning a language, you can increase your income and be among the first to access global updates. Foreign languages also open doors to international scholarships and admission to top universities around the world. Programs such as Erasmus+, DAAD, and El-Yurt Umidi are continually offering opportunities for those who have strong language skills. I believe these types of programs are essential for developing your network, making friends from different countries, and enhancing personal growth.

Furthermore, knowing a foreign language increases your employability. Every company values employees who can communicate across borders. Professions such as translation, journalism, diplomacy, tourism, and information technology are all closely tied to foreign languages. If we start learning multiple foreign languages today, we’ll never have trouble finding a job in the future.

Through foreign languages, a person gains a deeper understanding of other nations’ histories, traditions, arts, and lifestyles. This fosters tolerance, openness, respect, and intercultural communication. For instance, those who study Korean often become interested in Korean culture, films, music, and cuisine.
Knowing a language is a way of showing respect for other peoples — and a path to better understanding your own culture as well.

Learning a language is not just about memorizing words; it’s a process that requires logical thinking, memory, persistence, and dedication. A person who studies a foreign language constantly works on self-improvement and enhances their intellectual capacity — which leads to overall personal growth. It also develops one’s speaking skills, listening comprehension, and analytical thinking.

In conclusion, learning foreign languages is one of the most pressing and important tasks for today’s youth. Every young person should plan their time wisely and aim to master at least one foreign language.
Because language is the key to knowledge, the door to opportunity, and the path to progress.

Don’t get tired of learning languages. Keep going.

Zinnura Yo’ldoshaliyeva was born on June 17, 2011, in Rishton district, Fergana region. She is an 8th-grade student at the specialized school of Rishton district and serves as the leader of the “Talent” direction within the Rishton District Leaders’ Council.

She has actively participated in numerous projects, including:

• “Anim Camp”,
• “Future Founders Online Forum”,
• “Young Readers”,
• “STEM Regional Stage”,
  and others.

Her scientific article was published in the book “Emotions on Paper”, and she continues to be actively involved in various initiatives. Currently, she is studying English and Korean languages.

PRODUCTION OF SMART SUPERABSORBENT POLYMERS FOR SEALING CRACKS AND INCREASING THE STRENGTH OF CONCRETE STRUCTURES

Dean of the Faculty of Chemistry, Termez State University: B.A. Kholnazarov
E-mail: baxodir.xolnazarov@rambler.ru
Student of the Faculty of Chemistry, Termez State University: Jo‘rayev Ulug‘bek
E-mail: ulugbekjorayev901@gmail.com

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Abstract

This scientific work is devoted to studying the production of smart superabsorbent polymers (SAPs) and their integration into concrete mixtures with the aim of solving the problem of cracking in concrete structures and extending their service life. The study analyzes the hydrophilic properties of SAPs, particularly their ability to absorb and retain moisture from the surrounding environment and how this contributes to sealing microcracks and capillary voids within concrete. Furthermore, it demonstrates through practical experiments how the self-healing properties of these polymers enhance the structural integrity and water resistance of concrete.

The paper outlines the synthetic production methods of SAPs, their granulometric composition, chemical stability, and interaction with concrete. The final results serve to improve the long-term durability of concrete products, reduce maintenance costs, and contribute to the development of environmentally friendly innovative building materials. Moreover, SAPs help retain moisture within the concrete, thus supporting the continuation of the cement hydration process.

During the study, various SAP brands, their physicochemical properties, optimal dosages, and methods of integration into concrete mixes were examined experimentally. The results showed a significant improvement in crack resistance, water durability, and strength of concrete samples containing SAPs. This innovative approach enhances the reliability of building materials and extends their service life.

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Keywords:

Concrete structures, crack sealing, smart polymers, superabsorbent polymers (SAP), self-healing materials, strength, hydration process, water resistance, innovative construction materials, concrete composition, crack resistance, polymer additives, service life of concrete, construction material innovation, SAP technology, microstructure enhancement, environmentally stable materials, variable humidity conditions, technological additives, mechanical properties of concrete.

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Introduction

Today, in the construction industry, requirements such as durability, strength, and long-term performance are of crucial importance. In particular, ensuring the structural stability of concrete constructions remains a pressing issue. Although concrete is one of the most widely used construction materials, it is prone to the formation of internal and external microcracks over time due to various factors. These cracks weaken the structure, lead to corrosion, and shorten the service life of the material.

Therefore, developing technologies that allow concrete to self-heal and automatically seal such cracks is a significant goal. In recent years, smart materials—particularly superabsorbent polymers (SAPs)—have emerged as a promising solution, attracting increasing attention from the scientific and technical communities. These materials can absorb and retain environmental moisture and expand in volume within the concrete to fill cracks as they form. Additionally, by promoting continued cement hydration, SAPs enhance the internal structure of concrete.

This study focuses on producing such SAPs, investigating their properties, and evaluating their practical application in concrete mixtures. Despite the widespread use of concrete, one of its main disadvantages is the development of cracks due to internal pressure, temperature fluctuations, or external loads. These cracks reduce the mechanical strength of concrete and make it more susceptible to external influences, ultimately decreasing structural reliability and increasing repair needs.

Modern construction material technologies offer innovative approaches to solving this issue. In particular, the use of smart materials such as SAPs to develop self-sealing mechanisms in concrete is gaining significant interest. These hydrophilic polymers react with moisture in concrete, expand in volume, and effectively seal cracks. Moreover, they support the continued hydration process of cement, thereby strengthening the internal structure of concrete.

This research provides an in-depth analysis of the use of SAP technology to enhance the strength and crack resistance of concrete.

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Materials and Methods

Materials:
In this study, the following materials were used to improve the crack resistance and strength of concrete mixtures:

1. Portland Cement (CEM I 42.5N): A high-quality binder and the main component of concrete.
2. Natural Sand (0–2 mm): Ensures uniform mass and density of concrete.
3. Crushed Stone (5–10 mm): Enhances the mechanical strength of concrete structures.
4. Superabsorbent Polymers (SAP): Self-healing polymers that absorb moisture and expand to fill cracks.
5. Clean Water: Required for cement hydration and activation of SAPs.
6. Plasticizer (polycarboxylate-based): Reduces viscosity of the mix and improves workability.
7. SAP Stabilizer (if needed): Controls excessive swelling of SAPs and ensures even distribution in the mix.

Methods:
The following tests and experimental methods were applied to assess the crack resistance and mechanical properties of concrete and to study the effects of SAPs:

1. Preparation of Concrete Mix:
   Concrete mixes were prepared according to the GOST 10181-2014 standard. SAPs were added in amounts ranging from 0.1% to 0.5% of the cement mass. All samples were prepared under identical conditions using the same components.
2. Determining Water Absorption Capacity of Polymers:
   The water absorption of SAP samples was measured using the gravimetric method: pre-weighed SAP samples were immersed in distilled water for 24 hours, and weight increase was recorded.
3. Compressive Strength Testing:
   The compressive strength of concrete samples was tested at aging intervals of 7, 14, and 28 days following GOST 10180-2012 standards. Each test was conducted three times, and average values were calculated.
4. Crack Sealing Evaluation:
   Pre-cracked concrete samples were stored in a humid environment. The extent to which SAPs sealed the cracks was observed microscopically. Changes in crack width and depth were monitored over 28 days.
5. Water Resistance and Capillary Absorption Test:
   Water permeability of SAP-modified concrete was assessed using a vacuum chamber absorption test.
6. Microstructure Analysis (Structural Study):
   The internal structure of the concrete was analyzed using Scanning Electron Microscopy (SEM) to study the distribution of SAPs and their effect on hydration.

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Production of Superabsorbent Polymers (SAPs)

Superabsorbent polymers (SAPs) are hydrophilic polymers capable of absorbing and retaining large amounts of water. These are typically based on acrylic acid and its derivatives and are produced using specific chemical processes. The production process involves the following key stages:

1. Monomer Preparation:
   The main raw material for SAPs is acrylic acid (CH₂=CHCOOH). It is neutralized using agents such as NaOH, adjusting the pH to the 6–7 range.
2. Polymerization Process:
   The neutralized acrylic acid is mixed with a small amount of cross-linker (e.g., N,N′-methylenebisacrylamide) and an initiator (e.g., ammonium persulfate or sodium persulfate). These components initiate a radical chain polymerization reaction, usually carried out in an aqueous medium at 50–70°C.
3. Gel Formation:
   The resulting polymer forms an elastic gel with a cross-linked structure, capable of absorbing large volumes of water.
4. Drying:
   The fresh SAP gel is dried completely using a vacuum oven or a low-temperature dryer, resulting in a solid yet hydrophilic polymer granule.
5. Grinding and Sieving:
   The dried SAP is ground using a crusher and sieved to achieve the desired particle size (typically 100–800 microns). These granules are then added to concrete mixes.
6. Quality Control of Finished SAP:
   The final SAP product is tested under laboratory conditions for its water absorption capacity, density, swelling recovery, and thermal stability.

“Geoment Abacus” Device for Visually Impaired Children: An Innovative Approach in Geometry and Mental Arithmetic Education

Author:  Islomov  Inomjon Umidjon o‘g‘li

Student at the National University of Uzbekistan named after Mirzo Ulugbek
inomjon21022006@gmail.com

Keywords: Geometry, Mental Arithmetic, Visually Impaired Children, Inclusive Education, Geoment Abacus, Sensory Technology, Innovation.

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Abstract

This article analyzes the scientific and practical aspects of the interactive device project “Geoment Abacus” designed for visually impaired children. The device offers the opportunity to teach the basics of geometry and mental arithmetic through tactile perception. The article justifies the device’s effectiveness based on international experience, educational psychology, and inclusive education methodologies. It examines the challenges faced by visually impaired children in mastering geometry and mental arithmetic and outlines how the innovative “Geoment Abacus” can improve the effectiveness of teaching these subjects. The structure, functionality, and pedagogical value of the device are explained, with analyses based on practical trials.

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1. Introduction

When the education of visually impaired children is delivered through traditional methods, they often face significant difficulties with subjects that heavily rely on visual materials, such as geometry and arithmetic. According to the World Health Organization (WHO), approximately 285 million people worldwide have vision impairments, including about 19 million children [1]. This global issue necessitates specialized approaches within education systems.

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2. Description of the Geoment Abacus Device

The “Geoment Abacus” is an interactive device designed to teach geometry and mental arithmetic to visually impaired children using physical models. With this device, children can understand different geometric shapes through tactile interaction. For mental arithmetic, it uses a traditional abacus format adapted into a tactile version with distinguishable features.

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3. Scientific Foundations and International Experience

3.1. Tiflopedagogy and Haptic Learning

Tiflopedagogy is a specialized branch of pedagogy focused on teaching individuals with visual impairments. Research has shown that haptic (touch-based) teaching methods help visually impaired children develop imagination, spatial thinking, and the ability to navigate complex problem-solving situations [2].

3.2. International Experience

Similar approaches have been employed globally, such as the “Tactile Geometry Kit” developed by the Perkins School for the Blind in the United States and Japan’s “Feel Shapes” project. These devices allow students to understand shape, dimension, and spatial relationships through touch. Such tools have increased interest in STEM fields among visually impaired students [3].

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4. Composition and Technical Description of the Device

The initial production cost of the Geoment Abacus is approximately 1 million UZS, with serial production estimated at around 470,000 UZS. The device includes:

• A variety of tactile (raised) geometric models;
• Tactile abacus elements – sticks designed for tactile differentiation;
• An audio assistant guide for learners (planned in future versions).

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5. Expected Outcomes

By piloting the project, the following results are anticipated:

• Enhanced imagination and spatial reasoning among visually impaired children;
• Increased interest in geometry and arithmetic;
• Development of independent thinking and problem-solving skills through tactile learning.

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6. Pedagogical and Psychological Approaches

The Geoment Abacus is tailored to the multisensory learning styles of visually impaired students. It enhances independent thinking, memory, and the development of formal concepts, contributing positively to both cognitive and emotional learning processes.

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7. Conclusion

The Geoment Abacus represents not just a technological innovation but a step toward social equity. Its implementation can open new doors for visually impaired children in STEM education. Grounded in scientific principles and supported by international experience, such initiatives play a vital role in advancing inclusive education in Uzbekistan.

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References

1. World Health Organization (WHO). (2019). World Report on Vision.
2. Jones, L.A., & Lederman, S.J. (2006). Human Haptic Perception: Basics and Applications. Springer.
3. Smith, D.W., Kelley, P., & Hauser, P.C. (2015). “Tactile Learning for Blind Students in STEM.” Journal of Special Education Technology, 30(4), 195–204.

INCLUSIVE EDUCATION IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE TEACHING AND DEVELOPMENT: CORE PROGRAM INITIATIVE

Author: Turg‘unov Jonpo‘lat Olmosbek o‘g‘li (Independent Researcher, Buloqboshi District, Andijan Region)

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Abstract

This article explores modern approaches and programmatic foundations for advancing inclusive education, particularly in foreign language teaching. It emphasizes creating accessible learning environments for students with disabilities, employing adaptive methodologies, leveraging digital technologies, and honoring humanitarian principles. The paper presents current challenges and proposes solutions, advocating for effective integration of inclusive strategies into foreign language instruction. It also offers concrete suggestions and innovative ideas essential for implementing inclusive and differentiated instruction.

Keywords: Inclusive Education, Foreign Language Teaching, Teaching Methodology, Digital Technologies, Differential Instruction, Educational Equity, Pedagogical Adaptation, National and International Methodologies, Collaborative Initiatives, Inclusive Education Innovation

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Introduction

Inclusive education—enabling students with diverse needs to learn in a unified classroom—is grounded in human rights, social justice, and equality. The 2006 UN Convention on the Rights of Persons with Disabilities (CRPD) enshrines the right to inclusive education . In Uzbekistan, the 2020 amendments to the Education and Disability Rights laws provide a legal basis for inclusive practices, including in foreign-language instruction .

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Core Program Principles for Inclusive Foreign Language Teaching

• Differential Instruction: Teaching strategies and materials (e.g., audio, Braille, CEF-aligned subtitles) are adapted to each student’s physical or sensory needs.
• Adaptive Materials: Multimodal content like pictogram-based dictionaries, audio lessons, and short videos aid comprehension and engagement.
• Technological Support: Tools like screen readers, text-to-speech and speech-to-text, inclusive online interfaces, and virtual reality environments provide equitable access .
• Humanitarian and Psychological Support: Emotional support and psychologically sensitive teaching addressing motivation and resilience are essential for learners with special needs.

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Policy and Strategic Framework in Uzbekistan

Since 2021, national initiatives—including the presidential decree promoting inclusive education and the 2022–2026 National Program—have aimed to widen access and infrastructure, develop adapted textbooks, and prepare foreign language teachers for inclusive classrooms . Over 400 inclusive classrooms now exist nationwide, with gradual rollout of adaptive foreign language teaching practices in partnership with organizations like the British Council and UNICEF.

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Remaining Challenges

1. Teacher Shortage: There are not enough teachers trained to teach foreign languages inclusively. Recommendations include expanding university quotas, improving specialist training, and enabling international exchange programs.
2. Resource Constraints: Adapted textbooks, multimodal resources, and supplement tools remain scarce and require development.
3. Infrastructure Gaps: Many schools still lack inclusive-supportive technology—especially in remote areas. Establishing specialized learning centers and providing economic and financial support is vital.
4. Social Stereotypes: Misconceptions about the abilities of disabled students must be actively dismantled to protect their educational and psychosocial development.

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Conclusion

Applying inclusive teaching to foreign languages is integral to modern education. When differential methodology, adaptive materials, technology integration, and compassionate support are combined, all learners—regardless of ability—can access quality education. While Uzbekistan has made significant strides in inclusive policy and practice, further development in teacher capacity, infrastructure, and social awareness is essential for systemic progress.

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References:

1. Florian, L., & Black‑Hawkins, K. (2011). Exploring Inclusive Pedagogy. British Educational Research Journal, 37(5), 813–828.
2. Decree PQ‑81 (Jan 2022). National Program for Inclusive Education 2022–2026.
3. Uzbekistan Law on Education, updated 2020.
4. United Nations (2006). Convention on Rights of Persons with Disabilities.
5. UNESCO (2020). Inclusion and Education: All Means All. Global Monitoring Report.
6. British Council resources on inclusive education.
7. OECD educational guidelines for inclusive practices.

Turg’unov Jonpo‘lat Olmosbek o‘g‘li was born on December 4, 2007, in Buloqboshi district of Andijan region. He holds a secondary specialized education. He has achieved significant accomplishments and led various projects in the fields of ecology, socio-economics, and inclusive education. His articles have been published in more than 10 international journals. Currently, he is fluent in four languages.

My Mother’s Diary

My mother was chatting and laughing with the neighbors on the lush green grass. As their joyful laughter rose into the sky, suddenly dark clouds blanketed the heavens. A light rain began to fall. The women ran toward their homes. Thunder cracked through the sky, followed by a heavy downpour.

There’s a unique pleasure in watching the rain from behind a window—especially when the raindrops tap against the glass, stirring your thoughts. As I sat with a cup of coffee, the scene outside awakened memories. The rain wouldn’t stop. The streets were silent. Then the power went out. I reached for a candle, searching for matches. As always, they were probably in the box near the old cabinet where my mother’s photos were kept.

Indeed, when I opened the box, I was surprised to find my mother’s worn-out diary. I lit the candle and began to flip through it… I had seen the diary before but never read it. Now, as I turned each page, every line felt like a finger pressing on my heart.

Lightning lit up the room as if emphasizing each word. My little brothers, scared, buried their heads under the blanket while my mother listened to a greeting on the radio.

As a child, I was afraid to touch that notebook. My mother would scold me sharply:
— “Don’t touch it without permission, it’s mine!”

But today… with a trembling heart, I asked shyly:
— “Mom, may I read your diary?”

— “Alright… just be careful, the pages are very old. Inside are my childhood, my sorrows,” she said, her eyes filled with sorrow and permission at once.

The first entry was about a trip to Samarkand—I read it with delight. But the next page had a blank space that shook me.

“Why?”—I used to ask my mother such questions when I was little.
— “Mom, why does everyone have a father, but you don’t?”

She would sigh deeply, gaze at the sky, and with sadness in her voice reply:
— “My father flew to the sky. He’s watching over us from there. But don’t ever mention it when your aunt comes to visit!”

One particular line in the diary broke my heart:
“Spring, I hate you. When you come, I’m afraid you’ll take someone away again…”

That line unlocked more fragments from the past. When my older brother came home with wild spinach, my mother angrily gave it to the animals. My brother would plead:
— “Mom, please make green somsa! Jasur’s mom did!”

— “No! Just eat what I’ve made in silence!” she’d snap, and it used to irritate me.

Back then, I didn’t understand her harshness. But now… I think I do. Her dislike of spring, of green somsa—those were silent echoes of pain, memories tied to her father.

Further in the diary, there was a photograph of her father—tall, dark-haired, and dignified. Below it, a line read:

“Today was unforgettable. My father didn’t go to work!”

— “Daddy, aren’t you going to work?” I asked.

— “No! Today I’ll spend time with you all!”

But early in the morning, his friends came over, saying, “Let’s go to the mountains.” My sister cried:

— “So you’re not staying again?”

— “That’s enough! Don’t embarrass us in front of his friends!” my mother scolded as she took my sister away.

Was it necessary to go to the mountains on that rainy day?

The final lines of the diary tore at my soul:
“Father didn’t want to go. He said, ‘My feet feel heavy today.’ But he went anyway. We made green somsa and waited for him… He never came back.”

Reading these lines by candlelight, the rain hitting the window, and the wind outside felt like they were singing the sorrow in my mother’s heart.

Only now do I understand—this diary wasn’t just a collection of words, it was my mother’s silent scream.

I think my grandmother’s words had truth. My father would leave for work at dawn, long before we woke up. Sometimes he wouldn’t return for days—he carried the burden of two families.

Yet my grandmother supported him unconditionally. Even when he brought another woman with a child into our home, she welcomed them with kindness, offering new clothes without a glance of resentment. A different woman might have thrown her out, but my grandmother understood everything from my father’s eyes—without needing words.

That cursed day, my father left with his friends for the mountains. My sisters and I started making green somsa. In just an hour, it was ready. My grandmother had gone to a neighbor’s house to spin yarn. The house was tidy, our hearts filled with joy. For us, Father skipping work was a celebration.

But that celebration didn’t last long. Our neighbor, Eshim bobo, burst into the house—his slippers mismatched, face pale with fear.

— “Sharofat! Sharofat!” he shouted.

My sister’s face darkened:
— “Is everything okay? Speak quickly!” she said sarcastically.

— “Sharofat, Amir… there’s been an accident…”

— “What?! What are you saying?!” My mother’s breath caught, her gaze suspended midair. “This can’t be true!”

— “At first, I didn’t believe it either… but it’s real, sister. You must go to your in-laws’ home. They say he’s in critical condition…”

— “Tell me clearly! What happened?! Why are you suddenly saying such things?!”

Just then, my uncle and his friend arrived. They loaded us into the car, and we set off. The half-hour journey felt eternal for our shattered hearts.

When we reached my grandfather’s house, my grandmother was crying loudly, the house filled with grief. I was seized by panic. I desperately wanted to see my father—to hear someone say, “It’s not him.” But my legs trembled, my heart pounded.

Strangers kept entering—men with bloody hands, scarves at their waists, skullcaps on their heads. When we finally entered the room where my father lay, I saw him.

His watch still ticked on his wrist. His face was bruised, his body scratched. My grandmother let out a wail:
— “Oh, my God!” But we, still too young to comprehend death, didn’t understand why everyone was crying.

My sister tugged at his hand:
— “Dad, get up! Let’s go home! Where’s your car?!” But he didn’t move.

My grandfather wept:
— “You left your children behind, my dear son. How could you bear it?”

Later… we laid him to rest. As they carried his coffin out, the sky wept with us—a torrential rain as if nature, too, was mourning.

My sisters clung to our grandfather:
— “Grandpa, please don’t let them take our dad! You’re strong—stop them! Don’t let them separate us! We love our father!” they sobbed.

My sister screamed at my father’s friend, Rahmatjon uncle. He embraced her tightly, tears streaming down his cheeks.

— “If you hadn’t insisted, this wouldn’t have happened! Why are you silent?! Say something!”

Those questions hung in the air. There were no answers. Father was gone.

We held the memorials. We returned home. But the pain lingered. Every time I looked out the window, I imagined Father driving up again.

Spring, I hate you! You took my father away! I had barely tasted his love. But my little brother—he was only three. And my baby sister… she wasn’t even three months old. Every night my pillow soaked in tears, as if the pain in my heart spilled onto the bed.

Spring, please, don’t come again. The thought that you might take someone else from me makes my skin crawl…

Reading these pages, I couldn’t hold back my tears. We tried hard to fill the hole in my mother’s heart. But no… neither we, nor time, nor even Father himself could fill that emptiness.

That emptiness—was a scream in silence.

Xurshida Suvon qizi Abdisattorova was born on November 9, 1997, in Olmazor village, Chiroqchi district, Kashkadarya region. She is currently a third-year student at the University of Journalism and Mass Communications, majoring in Sports Journalism.

Her articles have been published in newspapers such as “Hurriyat” and “Vaziyat”, as well as on online platforms like “Olamsport” and “Ishonch”. She is also a participant in the international scientific-practical conference titled “Future Scientist – 2025”. Additionally, her article has been featured in the anthology “Let the World Hear My Words”.