A Matter of Scale
One side of the stage shows a MAN dressed in whatever clothing will connote poverty to the audience. The other side of the stage has a conference table and plush chairs with FOUR or FIVE PEOPLE in the day's business attire.
A few minutes of pantomime: the shabbily-dressed MAN is obviously begging; he is ignored or pushed aside by passersby, perhaps even arrested. The FOUR or FIVE are conducting negotiations: one will be handed a pen and sign an agreement, after which handshakes all around.
Voice (from dark center stage):
As it was in the beginning,
it is now, and shall ever be:
Panhandle for a few bucks,
you're a bum
Panhandle for a few hundred million,
you're a civic leader
(LIghts go down.)
THE END
The Last Word
Upstage L, a casket with mourners crying. Downstage R, a MAN preparing to speak of the deceased.
MAN: He was a liar, a cheat, a bully,
who made life difficult for those of us
who worked under him;
we were partially consoled by the thought
that most of us would outlive him
For those of us who did, he got us again,
dying in December to deliberately
thwart those of us who were
planning to piss on his grave
(Lights go down.)
THE END
For What It's Worth
A school anywhere in the United States, action to be demonstrated wordlessly as NARRATOR speaks.
NARRATOR (can be onstage or off):
There's something happening here
What it is is quite crystal clear
There's a kid with a gun over there
Who wants to do more than just scare
Once started he won't stop
Children, hear that sound
Everybody knows what's going down
The battle lines have been drawn
And the spree won't take very long
Bullets strike some very deep,
sending them to permanent sleep
Thoughts and prayers, I'm afraid,
won't make this sad day go away
Again and again that sound
Everybody knows what's going down
(Repeat last two lines at least twice)
(Lights go down.)
THE END
The History Game Show (Episode 2)
Setting: Two tables with four chairs each, one on each side of the stage, set at enough of an angle so that each chair is at least partially facing the audience. These two tables will be lit from the start of the play; center stage will be dark.
Cast of Characters:
MAN, whose identity will not be revealed until the end of the play
And tonight's show is
TO TELL THE TRUTH
MAN (speaking from dark center stage):
"It is conducted
for the benefit of the very few
at the expense of the very many",
"a racket . . . possibly the oldest,
easily the most profitable,
surely the most vicious"
"I helped purify Nicaragua
for the international banking house
of Brown Brothers
in 1909-1912
I brought light to the Dominican Republic
for American sugar interests in 1916
In China I helped to see to it
that Standard Oil went its way unmolested"
There are other instances I could give,
but I think these three will suffice
"Looking back on it, I feel
I might have given Al Capone a few hints
The best he could do was to
operate his racket in three city districts
We Marines operated on three CONTINENTS"
"In short,
I was a racketeer,
a gangster for capitalism"
This is the point in the old show where the four panelists would try to guess which of the four contestants was the real person whose achievements had been cited. If you are the one in a million who correctly guessed my identity, give yourself a prize.
(Lights go off the tables, come up on center stage, revealing the MAN
I am Smedley Butler,
once a Major General, USMC
(Lights go down.)
THE END
The History Game Show (Episode 5)
And tonight's show is
WHAT'S MY LINE?
(GUEST walks to the chalkboard, signs the name THOMAS MIDGLEY, and then sits next to the HOST.)
HOST: Are you ready, panel? (murmurs of yes from the panelists.)
PANELIST #1: Are you well-known to the general public?
MIDGLEY: No
PANELIST #2: Were you involved in the arts in any capacity?
MIDGLEY: No
PANELIST #3: Were you involved in what is today called STEM?
MIDGLEY: Yes
PANELIST #3: Were you involved in the Science part of that?
MIDGLEY (after quick consultation with the HOST): No
PANELIST #4: Were you involved with the Math part?
MIDGLEY looks at the HOST, who then answers for him.
Math was involved but not as the primary part,
so the answer has to be No.
PANELIST #1: Well, now I've got a fifty-fifty chance (chuckles from audience)
PANELIST #4: I'm betting he gets it wrong
No takers on that bet?
See the confidence people have in you
PANELIST#1: Were you involved in the Technology part?
MIDGLEY: No
PANELIST #4: I'm betting the next panelist gets it right
Again no takers
PANELIST #2: Were you involved in the Engineering part?
MIDGLEY: Yes
PANELIST #2: Were you involved in the building of bridges or roads?
MIDGLEY: No
PANELIST #3: Were you involved in the building of buildings?
MIDGLEY: No
PANELIST #4: Did you hold any patents?
MIDGLEY: Yes
PANELIST #4: I believe Mr. Midgley
is known as an inventor
HOST: That is correct
Mr. Midgley was known as an inventor
(Lights go down on everyone but the HOST, who continues speaking.)
That was his claim to fame during his lifetime,
and he was much honored by his peers
But during the decades after his death
his two most famous inventions,
leaded gasoline and chlorofluorocarbons,
continued to inflict untold damage
upon planet and people
He has been called
"a one-man environmental disaster"
but even that understates his impact
He can legitimately be called
the most destructive individual
of the twentieth century
(Lights dim.)
THE END
Michael Ceraolo is a 64-year-old retired firefighter/paramedic and active poet who has had two full-length poetry books published (Euclid Creek, from Deep Cleveland Press; 500 Cleveland Haiku, from Writing Knights Press), and has two more full-length books in the publication pipeline.