TWO CHEERS FOR TREASON
January 6, 2021
A mob stormed the Capitol
killing five police, wounding over 100.
Some were blindly loyal to Trump,
taken in by his “stolen election” line;
others were simply spoiling for a fight.
But-- despite the gallows prepped and ready,
Mike Pence didn’t get hung.
Despite Senators willing to double-cross voters,
replace electors with puppets,
and kiss the incumbent’s ring,
each state’s votes were ratified.
And despite Trump’s sore-loser grousing,
he wound up a lame duck.
December 12, 2022
MTG boasts to the NY Young Republicans Club:
“I gotta tell you something.
If Steve Bannon and I had organized that,
we would have WON.
Not to mention, it would have been armed.”
Here’s a Representative from Georgia
bragging that she could have pulled off
a better insurrection.
She would have brought more firepower,
blasted her way through those cops.
She would have marched over the dead and wounded,
defeated Congress, and forced their hand.
She would have WON.
Backed by guns and slogans,
she would have awarded Trump the oval office,
perhaps President for life.
Is this payback for Appomattox?
Rebellion not quelled, just postponed?
Trump’s infantry was a mix of malleable misfits,
Proud Boys, Oath Keepers, Q-Anon fruit-loops,
and politicians with an eye to the main chance.
January 6 was the day they’d change the world.
If a cult figure mouthing MAGA
could be enthroned at gunpoint,
kingmakers would hold undisputed power.
We would have won.
January 3, 2023
MTG places her hand on a bible
and swears to uphold the Constitution.
Are her fingers crossed?
She bragged she could bring the US to its knees--
if she led that mob;
if she armed the rioters
so they could gun down law enforcement;
if she took possession of the Capitol
to thwart Congress’ Constitutional job.
Her victory? Sabotaging a presidential election.
It makes one wonder:
should a person who cheers for gun-toting thugs
be running our country?
Should a person who brags about trashing ballots
be making laws?
Georgia’s white, rural 14th District thinks so.
They re-elected her,
despite her off-the-wall statements--
Jewish space lasers cause California wildfires.
Vaccinations are the devil’s “mark of the beast.”
Black Lives Matter protesters are terrorists.
Undocumented immigrants are rapists.
Transgender individuals are predators.
Abortion seekers and providers are murderers.
Democrats are pedophile-coddling Communists.
MTG hopes to be Trump’s running mate in 2024.
Trump, too, thinks his defeat so outrageous
that it justifies suspending the Constitution.
The two are salt and pepper shakers
showering spite and bile on a fragile democracy.
Abetting a taste for hate.
Copyright 12/2022 Patricia Doyne
TRUMP’S VIRTUES
Trump’s gung-ho to run again
in 2024.
He says it wasn’t fair that he
got booted out the door.
Many think him crass, it’s true.
Self-serving. Prone to lies.
But maybe narcissistic traits
are virtues in disguise.
He is, despite his girth and weight,
a physical fitness buff.
Visited golf links 308 times,
spent a quarter of his term on golf.
When shooters shoot up schools and malls
we know guns aren’t for Trump.
Five times he dodged his country’s draft.
Said casualties were chumps.
And family values is a realm
where Trump does truly shine.
Jared and Ivanka flaunt
his regime’s family line.
Forget two dozen rape reports
and Stormy Daniels’ book,
‘cause family pride glows in third wife
Melania’s well-dressed look.
What’s more, he reaches out a hand
to one-time foes. (Don’t groan.)
He sends love notes to Kim Jong-Un,
gets an $18 million loan.
When journalist Khashoggi died
at the consulate in Turkey,
“Bin Salman ordered it,” said the CIA.
Trump said the facts were murky.
And when Trump won, a Russian hand
pulled strings. The CIA spied it.
Said, “Russia, leave our elections alone!”
Shrugged Trump, “Putin denied it.”
Yes, Trump extends a welcoming hand
to strong men he admires.
Sells airplanes, crude oil, tanks and guns
to somewhat shady buyers.
And Trump’s an open-minded man.
When Neo-Nazis march,
he sees good people on both sides,
beneath free speech’s arch.
When Ye claims Hitler’s misunderstood,
and Fuentes flat denies
the Holocaust was real, that’s cool.
“Respect their views,” Trump cries.
His bosom buddies—Roger Stone,
Steve Bannon, Alex Jones—
show how Trump welcomes one and all,
especially pale skin-tones.
He disses “shithole countries.”
He tried to build a wall.
Just goes to show that Trump was true
to MAGA’s siren call.
And Trump’s unique. Never before
a President twice impeached.
He’s going down in history—
for January 6th, at least.
So if you want to bad-mouth Trump,
Please take careful note
of all his virtuous qualities
when you step up to vote.
Copyright 12/2022 Patricia Doyne
Q-ANON MEETS QVC
Mirror, mirror on the wall,
reveal the winner I really am—
not a fat old suit with a long, red tie,
tan from a tube, hair fussed and sculpted.
No, show my base their favorite President--
Better than Lincoln!
Better than Washington!
Show the whole world the superhero
who should have won.
A MAJOR ANNOUNCEMENT:
(Drumroll)
Digital Trading Cards!
Only $99 each.
Send your money, we’ll choose your NFT.
Take what you get; what you get is virtual.
It exists in the ether,
like the image, like the “very exclusive community”
I’m selling.
See me in a cowboy hat and duster,
a western lawman.
See me dominate the room in a black tuxedo.
See me suited for space, two feet on the moon.
See me alone on a bleacher-ringed field,
owning that football.
See me speeding to the rescue on a white horse.
See me in a mild-mannered blue suit
ripping open my shirt to reveal a red “T”
and scald the world with laser eyes.
The face is mine, but photo-shopped bodies
are all young and buff.
The world needs superheroes.
But the world’s got me.
Mirror, mirror on the wall,
show the world I’m what they really want
virtually.
Copyright 12/2022 Patricia Doyne
2 thoughts on “Poetry from Patricia Doyne”
Satire lives with Pat Doyne. Well-done!
I find the middle one the strongest, for the playfulness the rhyming evokes. What’s too depressing for words needs all the help it can get.
Satire lives with Pat Doyne. Well-done!
I find the middle one the strongest, for the playfulness the rhyming evokes. What’s too depressing for words needs all the help it can get.