It’s Hayward’s Fault!

Hey there,
We’re neighbors, you know

Yes, in fact I run right through
the heart, of the Heart,
 Of the Bay.
That curb that’s broken,
 That fence that’s shifted,
 Those cracks in your plaster—
Yep, that’s me.

No one pays me much attention—
Though they should!
Attention follows my cousins,
Loma Prieta, 89,
 and San Francisco, 06.
 But before 06
I was the talk of the town.

“The Great One,”
 you called me,
 And I’m still here,
 Right Here,
In the center of every thing
 you love!
Loma Prieta was near
 Santa Cruz,60 miles away!

San Fran 06 wasn’t even
 in San Francisco,
But offshore, out in the Pacific.

 Yet I’m right here,
snaking my way
 along Mission Blvd.
through homes, freeways,
 churches, hospitals
 U.C. Berkeley even,
 And frankly,
 your inattention
 is beginning
 to bore me.

Make no mistake,
 I’ve been bored before,
October 21, 1868,
 To be exact.

The cure for boredom
is excitement—
and boy did I deliver!
Rumbling, roaring, reverberating--
 I twisted, I turned,
Toppling chimneys off walls,
 Houses off foundations,
 Two stories became one,
Large cracks split the earth,
 Springs went dry,
 Springs gushed forth,
And the ground undulated--
Wave after wave
Upon nightmarish wave:
Taking life from many;
Sending some into such panic
That they lost their mind
Before, satisfied, I settled,
 Once again.

 There were few of you
 here then,
But now there are millions—
 MILLIONS,
AND I’M BORED AGAIN!

Hey, did I mention
that we’re
neighbors?
Close,
close
close
neighbors!



The Challenge

The challenge, 
	Spoke my cousin,
		Is for me, a practiced poet, 
	To write a positive poem
		  About Trump.

“Huh?”  I gasped,
	Write something positive
		About the pathological liar?
			The lifelong crook?
		  The egotistical egotist?
		The defiler of our democracy? 

Hmmmm! 
   
	But then it dawned on me—
		I never liked George Bush,
		But when compared with Trump,
		He seems a shining star.

So thank-you, Donald.
	You are so bad,
	You made even Bush seem good.



Putin on the Ritz

Vladimir, oh Vladimir,
Oh have you met Vladimir,
Vladimir the DONald’s idol.

Vladimir, oh Vladimir,
Trump thinks that he’s such a dear,
To Donald, dear Vlad is vital.

Vlad hacked Hillary so Trump could win it all,
Trump just won’t admit this,
He’s bursting with gall.
But he’s now the puppet,
In Vlad’s gaming hall
He’ll sell,  us out,  to Vladimir.

Vladimir, oh Vladimir,
Oh have you met Vladimir
Vlad the great PUPPet master.

Vladimir, oh Vladimir,
Trump thinks you’re hot, Vladimir,
He cares not that you’re a bastard.

But Vlad has dear Donald,
Right by the short hairs,
He wants NATO weakened
As much as he dares,
And Donald will help him
Like nobody cares
Cuz he’s under the spell of Vladimir!

Vladimir, oh Vladimir,
Trump thinks of you like a mirror,
Thus you must be the best of them ALLLLLL,

Donald thinks that Vlad likes him 
Because he’s so smart,
He can’t comprehend
That Vlad don’t give a fart,
That Vlad’s only goal 
Is tear NATO apart,
Trump’ll help because it’s Vladimir.