Christopher Bernard: Trumplandia

The News from Trumplandia

(Adapted from the Work of Basho, John Milton, Emily Dickinson, and T. S. Eliot)

Mauled, marred, and mutilated by Christopher Bernard

 

Mr. Trumpollinax

When Mr. Trumpollinax walked across the United States

His laughter fell like a bull’s cock among the teacups.

I thought of W., now a shy figure in the manzanita,

And of H.W. in the shrubbery

Slobbering over the hottie on the swing.

In the palace of Mrs. Flaccus at Professor Ernest Doolittle’s

He laughed like a psychotic poodle.

His laughter was quite subversive, though renowned,

Like the old man’s demented tittering

Hidden under the dying coral reefs.

I looked for the head of Mr. Trumpollinax rolling under his limo,

Or grinning on a screen

Of a topless bar in Dubuque or Sioux Falls,

With tar sand in its hair.

I heard the beat of a satyr’s goat-like hooves over Manhattan cement

As his acrid insults devoured the afternoon.

“He is a charming man, when you get to know him.” “But after all what did he mean?”

“His pointed ears, his half-eaten eyes . . . he must be unbalanced.”

“There was something he said I might have challenged—

A thousand things, but now—”

Of the dowager Mrs. Flaccus and Professor and Mrs. Doolittle

I remember only this: a piece of toast.

And of Mr. Trumpollinax his smiling, munching teeth.

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Poetry from J.J. Campbell

12 hours of bliss
 
another drunken night
of loneliness scribbling
down the first words
that come to mind
insanity never tasted as
good as you did on our
last night together
12 hours of bliss
in hindsight
i should have known
it would never get any
better
only the lucky ones
get to leave on top

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Essay from Donal Mahoney

A Shining Star at Every Wake
 
Bill hates to go to parties but he loves to go to wakes. One of the advantages of being old, he says, is that there are fewer parties to go to but a lot more wakes. 
 
At parties he finds a distant corner, stands there like a sentinel and watches the young folks have fun. 
 
“At parties the young move among each other like bees among flowers,” Bill says. “When I was young I tried to find the right flower and hover there, if you know what I mean.”
 
Although he doesn’t approach anyone to start a conversation, Bill’s not upset when people approach him. Some young folks want to know why is the old guy standing in the corner. And he doesn’t hesitate to tell them. 
 
“I came with my wife,” he says. “She’s out on the floor somewhere having a good time.”
 
Moments later, he adds the obvious: “She’s an extrovert and I’m not.”
 
At parties Bill and his wife always slow dance at least once even though he says he has two left feet. He says that after 50 years of marriage, his wife’s used to having her feet under his. He says she never complains. She loves parties and is happy that he’s willing to come along, even if it’s only to stand in a corner. 
 
At wakes, however, Bill comes out of his shell. He’s in his element at wakes.
 
“I’m the life of the party at a wake,” Bill says, “if you’ll excuse the expression.” 
 
His modus operandi at a wake isn’t complex. First he consoles the bereaved and then talks to anyone and everyone who has come to the wake. When Bill has finished his rounds, everyone, even the dead person’s kin, feel a little better. 
 
“Bill should have been an undertaker,” his wife says, coming back from the dance floor.
 
Bill says he would have been an undertaker but in most states you have to be an embalmer to qualify as an undertaker. 
 
“Embalming is not a trade I ever wanted to learn,” Bill says. “But I don’t have to be an embalmer to help people feel a little better at a wake.”
 
Several years ago, a friend of Bill’s lost his wife and Bill, of course, went to the wake. 
 
He was talking to the widower when a lady walked up, interrupted them and said to the widower, 
 
“I know you’re not ready to date, but when you are so inclined, I would like to throw my hat in the ring.” 
 
Bill and the widower were shocked, but later the widower dated the woman and married her. In a relatively short time, she spent most of his money and then divorced him when he got sick. He died a year later very much alone. 
 
Had Bill known his friend was sick, he would have tried to supply him with support. He has great empathy for the dying as well as for those mourning the dead. 
 
Going to wakes reminds Bill that some day he will be the guest of honor at his own wake. He has mixed feelings about that. 
 
“I don’t know if there is ever a perfect person for someone,” Bill says, “but my wife is the only one for me.” 
 
He thinks it’s selfish to want to die first but that is his wish. He doesn’t want to live without his wife by his side.
 
“She’s my North Star….my compass,” he says. “I wouldn’t want to dance on anyone else’s feet.
—————————————————————————
Donal Mahoney, a product of Chicago, lives in exile now in St. Louis, Missouri. His fiction and poetry have appeared in various publications, including The Wisconsin Review, The Kansas Quarterly, The South Carolina Review, The Christian Science Monitor, The Chicago Tribune and  Commonweal.

Poetry from Mahbub

 

Despair

Once I was suddenly attacked in my heart

I tried to speak loudly but failed

I tried again but failed

As I spoke from heart and belly

Once I suddenly got struck

How should I stand before

My students are my audience

I am on the stage

I lectured with full of my voice

Suddenly it was stopped by fear or despair

Now after thirteen years the condition is better

But I faint often

When it rises in my thought

It can’t be exposed

But the fire burned in my heart

Make me cry silent

My breath stops

Life is too short

I think and again despair.

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Poem from Joan Beebe

VALENTINE LOVE
 
Two hearts entwined
 
In an unbroken circle
 
A pledge of everlasting love
 
To the end of time
 
A circle can become tarnished
 
Through all the years
 
But it remains unbroken
 
Because the memories of those
 
Words that were spoken so long ago,
 
I love you with all my heart,
 
And the ring remains as
 
A circle of love.

Poetry from Tony Nightwalker LeTigre

*the day before the next winter storm*
by tony nightwalker letigre
portland, oregon 31 december 2017

@ Sisters today
woman w/ curly hair & glasses behind me
(a regular, part of the fam)
talks to guy sitting across from her—
because @ sisters everyone sits with everyone:
children bounce happily on a stranger’s knee,
frail old crones sit in the laps of lean young street wolves—
& you make conversation with any crazy meteorite that crashes
into your table’s solar system, unless you’re mildly autistic
or whatever, in which case you eat silently,
sipping hot cocoa that’s one-third black coffee
& dipping into the filigree & shadow of french literature
((o people, do you know the joys it can bring?))
or make nervous laughing but ultimately suprisingly viable
conversation with a stranger,
but if the two of you are guys, or overly nutty,
it will likely take a fetid turn,
& soon you will be speaking of the choice
between fried worms or grasshoppers for breakfast)
She was telling him about this other girl she knows
who has been suffering harassment from goblins
there are people who are goblins
bullyrags who bedevil their selected targets
(usually the most vulnerable, the least lovely, the least privileged)
with mean goblin games to drive them crazy

“So you’re not you’re not crazy, see?”
she said, meaning to console them

“But the things is… I am, actually,”
he answered, with a rowdy laugh

I tore open a pack of “coffee creamer”
then a second
dumped them into my coffee
picked up the creamer packet afterwards & read the lengthy list of contents
then saw at the bottom,

DISTRIBUTED BY NESTLé USA, INC.
GLENDALE, CA 91203
QUESTIONS OR COMMENTS?
“Hey,” I thought,
“That’s the company that tried to muscle in & steal the water source
at Cascade Locks, & then after they were quickly voted down by the public,
they moved upriver to try the same scam at the next town”

Then I was salvaging a pair of pissed-in brown pants down the block
& Shannon saw me, came out & talked
“Sorry I sound terrible I’ve got a throat cough thing” she said

“Yes,” I replied with a jolly cornbread laugh,
“The next time I introduce you to someone I’ll say,
‘This is Shannon… she sounds terrible,
but she’s actually a wonderful person.’ ”

HAR HAR har har har

you funny mista

then a firetruck came
& I thought of Trump & how
“even the wise cannot foresee all ends”
& “a traitor may betray himself & do good that he does not intend”
(tolkien quotes)
& offered an oblique analogy to someone who looked desolate on the street corner,
saying “a friend of mine was supposed to go to that party at the GhostShip warehouse
in Oakland the night of the fire,
but she had a setback in court,
which drove her to stay home with a bottle of cheap tequila instead,
so by the supposedly blind hand of providence as it were,
she missed the chance to possibly die,
in a terrible art warehouse fire.”

I’m not sure what I meant by this
but I hope it helped

On my way outta the next place,
A guy finishes saying something about god & people with godly delusions
with an amazing line that brings down the snow-threatening sky:
“It wasn’t a MIRACLE,
pal,
that was a DREAM!”

+11+

Essay from Randle Aubrey

Just like moons and like suns,
With the certainty of tides,
Just like hopes springing high,
Still I’ll rise.

– Maya Angelou, “Still I Rise”

PE Still We Rise

Where do we go from here?

That seems to be the question on the mind of nearly every liberal and progressive since Election Day. Trump’s victory has the left in complete disarray, and despite the terrific show of force that was made during the Women’s March, there has yet to emerge any clear cut strategy for dealing with the Trump Organization that doesn’t involve politics as usual in Washington. The Democratic Party meanders somewhere between mindless navel-gazing and meaningless internecine squabbles, gradually acquiescing to the Trump Organization and the three-piece jackboots of the Republican Party as they rapidly flush large chunks of the federal government down the latrine, flooding the country with piss and shit and fear and despair. Hillary Clinton is in exile, sales of George Orwell’s 1984 are  through the roof, and Capitol Hill is looking more and more like the Reichstag with every passing day.

What’s a revolutionary to do?

There’s an argument to be made that trying to reform the Democratic Party from the ground up through things like the 50-state strategy is the way to go. But persuading major coalitions like the DNC and the DCCC to reverse course away from the corporatocracy is like trying to stop a steam train with a penny on the rail; you’re only going to be flattened into something unrecognizable by the rush of so-called “progress.”
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