Essay from Xurshıda Abdısattorova

Young Central Asian woman with dark reddish-brown hair, small earrings, and a tan poofy jacket.

The coach behind MMA’s determination and victories

Many people have different opinions about MMA. Some consider it a bloody fight, a competition without rules. Some even criticize it as a “game of street thugs.” In fact, MMA is a mixed martial arts, which also has strict rules and regulations. People who know this sport well understand that skill, discipline, and hard work are in the first place.

In 2018, the MMA Federation was established in our country, opening the doors to the international arena for our athletes. After that, MMA quickly became popular in Andijan, Bukhara, Kashkadarya, Samarkand, and Fergana regions. Today, Chiraqchi district is also becoming one of the leading regions in this regard.

Bahrom Haydarov’s role in this development is incomparable. He is a 10-time Uzbek champion, 2-time Asian champion, and world champion in MMA. He has also achieved many victories in professional MMA. Today, he is sharing his experience with young athletes.

Bahrom Haydarov’s training is a school of its own. He trains his students as if they were fighting in the octagon. The requirements are strict: an athlete who is late for training will not be allowed to compete. Of course, where there is order, there will be progress. Although the coach is very strict, it is a good experience for his students. “Where there is no discipline, there will be no progress,” he says. The strict coach teaches his students not only the secrets of fighting, but also life lessons.

Our hero is training more than 100 athletes. About 20 of them have already won championships in our country and international competitions. Students such as Anvar Pardayev, Mirjalol Yusupov, Aziz Nurjonov, Jasmina Abdumoʻminova and Shahboz Ortikov are his pride. They are flying the flag of the country high and introducing the younger generation to MMA.

Bahrom Haydarov’s work proves another thing: true heroism is not in the ring, but in teaching others his knowledge, inspiring young people. Today, young people who train under the guidance of their teacher have big dreams and are working tirelessly to achieve them.

Therefore, the young champions emerging from the Chiraqchi MMA School are becoming the pride of our tomorrow.

Abdisattorova Khurshida Suvon qizi was born on November 9, 1997 in the village of Almazar, Chiroqchi district, Kashkadarya region. She is a 3rd-year student of the Sports Journalism Department of the University of Journalism and Mass Communications. Currently, her articles have been published in the newspapers “Hurriyat”, “Vaziyat” and on the websites “Olamsport” and “Ishonch”. She is a participant in the international scientific and practical conference “Future Scientist _ 2025”.

Poetry from Luis Cuauhtemoc Berriozabal

Too Quiet

In this country
sons are born and sons are dying
in streets, in prisons, and in wars.
This country is too quiet,
so quiet, that the truth gets buried.

Why are the sons in the streets?
Why are they so poor they need 
to rob, steal, and kill?
Why are they so desperate to escape
this life with booze, drugs, and
instant gratification?

Why are the schools, teachers, and
families not given the support to help
the sons succeed?
Why are the rich given government 
handouts to amass more wealth at 
the expense of poor families, sons,
and daughters?

In this country 
no one wants to hear the truth.
This country is too quiet,
so quiet that the truth is buried.

*

Doors

Doors open at 7pm.
Songbirds sing all day long
10-dollar cover charge at the door
Songbirds do not charge one dime Dirt and dust cover
The soles on the feet of the poor
Being unable to afford the show

They settle for the birds that sing
For them outside the door all day long

The feet of the poor need
Socks and shoes, ointment for 
Blisters, dryness, and sunburn
Something for the hunger

A room to rest their tired bodies
Some still dance on tired feet
Songbirds sing for them at no charge
The door will close at 2am
*

New Suit

New suit
Same me
Nothing
Will change

New suit
Same me
It fits
Barely

Haircut 
Fresh shave 
About
Time now

Same me

Just so

You know
My friend

New suit
Same me
Let’s go
Out now

Same you
Same me
Like it

Should be

*

Here We Are

Here they come.
They know my name.
They see me.
I am their prey.
Here they come
To take my voice.
Their masked mugs 
Are all I see.
My time comes.
The masked men come
Like mad dogs.
These masked men,
A flock of them,
Will banish 
My rights. I watch
Them burn with
Rage. Behind them,
The moon shines 

On. Here they come.

Here we are.

Born at the Museum

I know your name.
Weren’t you born at the museum?
You came out of a painting.
A brush and oils created you.

You lived in a boathouse.
At fourteen you used to
like eating coconut meat.
Weren’t you born at the museum?

I hardly recognize you.
The wind tossed your hair around.
You came out of a painting.

The museum is closed on Holidays.
You lived in a boathouse.
That is my memory from childhood.

Poetry from Ken Gosse

Different Feathers?

Has free verse been freed from tradition?

Was the latter determined adverse?

Is different different than better?

Just what is the price of free verse?

Does free verse have better transmission?

Is tradition decidedly worse?

Is better better than different,

and will the twain ever converse?

Be Realio-Trulio

Sonnets ill-used,

erroneous meter,

perhaps a reader

will be confused

when it’s perused—

although by name

it may be the same.

If form is abused,

rhyming refused

(not really a rose),

it clearly shows

its poet accused.

Though enthused,

none are excused.

The Piper’s Sonnet

Although I write this sonnet silently,

clandestine, as it were, so none may see,

I wonder whether someday I’ll allow

its light to shine and break its silent vow.

So why express in secret on a page

the thoughts in which I currently engage?

It’s hard to say, although on August 3rd

no surreptitious sonnet is absurd.

By that, I mean that none would not suffice;

by writing one, at least, you pay the price

the Piper calls for on this special day

so that his tune won’t swoon each muse away.

To write or not? I’ll do it secretly.

For now, a covert action just for me.

I Come to Raze Your Ears, Not Praise Them!

I went to a poetry reading

with a follow-up open mic.

It’s the first time that I’d been to one—

didn’t know what they might like.

So, alrighty then,

I could listen without care,

since diversity of poetry

wasn’t what had brought me there.

We all heard the featured poet

reading from his new chapbook.

It’s the first time that I’d been to one

and I read the one I took.

Well, alrighty, then,

they could listen without care,

since diversity of poetry

wasn’t what had brought them there.

The second poem, “Be Realio-Trulio,” is a “minison,” a form established by The Minison Project (https://theminisonproject.com/): 14 lines, 14 letters per line, and a 14-letter title.   

The third, “The Piper’s Sonnet,” was written a month ago for Surreptitious Sonnet Day, August 3rd.

The last, “I Come to Raze Your Ears, Not Praise Them!” was written to the tune of Ricky Nelson’s 1972 hit tune “Garden Party.”

Poetry from Duane Vorhees

ROULETTE

I finger your empty chamber

put you to my lips

BANG

ALL DECISIONS OF THE COMMITTEE SHALL BE FINAL

Your hand is your destiny,

slight or calloused.

So, whether you be an artist

or you be a thief,

no matter where your heart is,

you’ll come to grief.

There’s a Hanging Committee

for the gallows,

and one for the gallery.

ISES MAY BE ISN’TS

It’s rape, not sex, unless it is

reciprocal, enjoyable,

spontaneous, and synchronous.

Sabers and foils, not visors, veils —

What we may get’s not what we want.

When we need sails we may have gales.

Land that’s fragrant’s also vacant.

No interval is eternal.

All that’s secret is not sacred.

THE DANCE: NANCY

I said I wouldn’t dance with you;

Your hair’s too blond, your eyes too blue.

A loaded gun and fully cocked,

dynamite cap set to go off.

I swore I wouldn’t dance with you.

She’s too proud of humility.

Her giant modesty towers from her knees.

She’s so proud of humility, the giant Modesty towers from the knees.

Even us healthy ones she treats like disease.

I said I wouldn’t dance with you.

Your arms, I knew, would hold like glue

No neon ever hijacked us,

I refused to be target practice

I knew I’d never dance with you.

Oversharp in her ignorance, she’s

indisputably a genius between the knees.

Oversharp in her ignorance, undeniably she’s a genius between her knees.

The peacock preens, pretending that no one sees.

I said I wouldn’t dance with you:

The night’s too young, too bright’s the view.

But that bandit moon lit the fuse,

and insurgent night made the news,

though I’d said I’d never dance with you.

dancing in the moon

light with Nancy and kissing her good –

Night

comes quickly this time of year

and icily as well: the wind

bites nicely and to the quick –

oh these thoughts! are dancing nicely

through the wind kissing this memory

somehow – I can hear the

memory embers

hissing in the wind (is sharp

this time of year) like java in the night

comes dark and sharp and bitter.

spring it was or was it fall? (no matter)

(no matter at all the season) the reason

I recall at all is Nancy her name

whispers in the moon light, or

is it the night

wind that’s light

or was it the fall –

– no matter –

it was time and she was mine and we were

hours until the dawn (comes quickly, this time)

and I must go on:

I wanted to go on, to bound

fast as the hound Wind

and as free too but I was bound too fast to this ground

and ground too far down and

ground far too fine too but I danced on

with Nancy ‘til I was out of time

and out of mind (but I must go on for now)

I dance with my mind I dance

with the wind and the night and the ice and

but where is the Nancy?

I dance with memory and death and death and memory

and now the dancing’s through, for

every spring one makes fall’s not far behind –

and life and mind and the night and the wind

go quickly this year of time and mightily as well

and all matter

(but no matter)

Essay from Shahnoza Ochildiyeva

Young Central Asian woman in a black vest and white blouse with a bookshelf behind her and a lanyard around her neck.

“In the Land of White Lilies” – The Country of Wonders

“Fate placed swamps and rocks in our way, but we cultivated them and built a civilized country.”

Book cover with a white lily on a pond. Finland, the Country of White Lilies by Grigory Petrov, translated by Muge Sozer.

Humanity often reflects only on the present moment, on what it sees today. Unfortunately, we sometimes fail to balance the positive and negative aspects of an issue—or, in pursuit of the present, we forget the past. Grigory Petrov’s book “In the Land of White Lilies” tells the story of Finland, now regarded as one of the happiest nations in the world, and how it emerged from its dark and difficult past into the bright present we know today.

First, let us pause to consider the title. Why “the land of white lilies”? The lily is known as a symbol of grace, beauty, and purity. Finland, in turn, is compared to a lily blooming in the swamps—because geographically it lies in an inhospitable land, deprived of nature’s abundance. Its terrain was long covered with marshes and rocks, with very little fertile soil. Much of its grain had to be imported from abroad. Yet the people strove tirelessly to survive amid these swamps, bringing fertile soil to the rocky lands, and creating for themselves the conditions of a dignified life.

Today, Finland is recognized worldwide, yet it is, in fact, a young state—barely 70 to 80 years of independent history. For centuries, the Finnish people endured the pain of colonial rule. At first, under Swedish domination, they were considered ignorant and backward. Children of the Swedish nobility who were unfit even for modest education and worthless at home were sent to Finland to occupy high administrative posts. Naturally, these shallow rulers continued their lives of ease here as well. The misery of the people under such leadership is not hard to imagine.

After Finland was ceded to Russia in 1816, the country’s condition improved somewhat. True national heroes arose—leaders we might call the Finnish “Jadids,” who called their people to enlightenment, to education, and to a dignified way of life. Among them, J. Snellman holds a special place. He awakened in the Finnish heart a deep sense of homeland, nation, and belonging. Finnish officials gradually replaced foreign administrators, and special emphasis was placed on education to nurture new, capable generations. At Snellman’s initiative, old books were collected and distributed to rural and remote areas.

When Napoleon’s defeat brought a wave of imitation of America and Britain—especially in football, which glorified brute strength—Snellman reminded the youth that without intellect and wisdom, strong legs were worthless. Just as the ball is kicked upward to move forward, he said, so too must the nation be lifted upward by thought and knowledge. The people united! From within its swamps, Finland blossomed into a graceful and cultured state.

As the book highlights, one cannot help but be amazed at how Finland resolved social issues. There are no homeless people. Problems like poverty and unemployment are approached with practical solutions. I was astonished to learn that Finland is also among the most “online” nations in the world, with unrestricted internet access, 100% coverage, and even free usage.The book also sheds light on Finland’s unique approaches in many spheres, especially education. Finnish education is a subject in itself—a system based on a fresh vision and beautiful national values. Petrov describes Finnish schools so vividly that you find yourself longing to enter one. Single-story buildings, spacious gardens, glass-walled classrooms, and freedom in learning—such features are truly astonishing! There are no rigid examinations or strict grading systems. Yet, classes are regarded as sacred, and teachers hold the highest respect in society. Finnish education seeks to nurture free thinking, broad perspectives, responsibility, and the sense of happiness in children—through lessons harmonized with values, music, and play.

This “land of lilies” also ranks high on the global happiness index. According to Petrov, one of the secrets of Finnish happiness lies in reading. Finland is recognized as the world’s most book-loving nation. The Finns consider their very existence a blessing. For them, happiness lies not in wealth or luxury, but in cherishing small and simple things.

The book also tells the stories of remarkable figures such as the “King of Confectionery” Jarvinen and the pirate Karokep—individuals whose lives, achievements, and contributions to the nation’s progress and welfare deserve recognition.

Dear friends, never accidentally pick up “In the Land of White Lilies”! Otherwise, like me, you might fall in love with its title. Do not read it, my dear peers—otherwise, you will find yourself longing to travel to Finland, to embark on a beautiful journey there. Of course, I am joking! Indeed, you must read it. For it teaches us to love our people, to recognize the power of a nation, and to learn how an awakening people can progress. And most of all, it invites us to reflect—by comparing Finland’s path of development with our own present day.

SHAHNOZA Ochildiyeva 

2nd-year student, Philology and Language Teaching: English, Faculty of International Relations and Social-Humanitarian Sciences, University of Journalism and Mass Communications of Uzbekistan.

Essay from Madina Furkatova

Young Central Asian teen girls seated at a classroom table listening to one of them standing to speak to them. Uzbek flags and bookshelves in the background.

Breaking Barriers: Young Women Leaders Transform Uzbekistan Through Revolutionary “EmpowerHer” Forum

Madina Furkatova 

Coordinator of Uzbekistan Youth Union,

 Founder of “Community Changers” volunteer club

Email: furqatovamadina7@gmail.com  Contact: +998901027107

In a groundbreaking initiative that connected 150 young women across Uzbekistan and Karakalpakstan, the “EmpowerHer: Republican Women Leaders Forum” has emerged as a catalyst for unprecedented change in female leadership development. This three-day online forum, spearheaded by the “Community Changers” club, addresses a critical gap that has long hindered the region’s progress: limited access to leadership development opportunities for young women.     

It was great opportunity and inspiration for me to join the Leader Girls Forum. It was a truly inspiring event where I learned practical skills on leadership, communication, and self-confidence.

I especially valued the supportive atmosphere and the chance to connect with other motivated young women. The forum encouraged me to believe in my potential and left a lasting positive impression. — Mehribon Xayrullayeva

Tackling the Root of Gender Inequality

The project directly confronts three fundamental challenges plaguing young women in Central Asia. Geographic isolation prevents talented women from connecting with peers and successful role models across different provinces, creating isolated pockets of untapped potential. A systematic information gap about international scholarships, prestigious university programs, and global career pathways has left countless capable women unaware of opportunities that could transform their futures. Most critically, the absence of structured leadership development programs specifically designed for young women has meant that practical skills in entrepreneurship, financial independence, and professional networking remain largely inaccessible.

We identified that talented young women remain underrepresented in key leadership roles across government, business, and civil society organizations due to lack of preparation and networks. The consequences are far-reaching: promising female talent either emigrates without contributing to local development or remains underutilized, missing opportunities for both personal growth and national advancement.

A Comprehensive Solution Taking Shape

The EmpowerHer forum operates through a systematic two-phase approach that has proven remarkably effective. Phase One involves a rigorous 20-day application and selection process, ensuring committed participants are identified through careful screening. Phase Two delivers an intensive three-day forum featuring expert speakers, interactive workshops, and crucial networking sessions.

The project’s success lies in its comprehensive components. Expert speaker sessions feature accomplished women leaders including Khurshida Rakhmonova, Chief Coordinator of Girls’ Voice Club; Saida Abdunazarova, winner of the US KECTIL and Aspire Leaders Program; and Gulnur Esova, a UK University Master’s student. These sessions provide participants with real-world insights from women who have successfully navigated international opportunities while maintaining their cultural roots.

Skill development workshops cover essential areas: personal development, financial independence, CV enhancement, startup creation, and leadership discovery. The networking platform connects participants from various provinces and Karakalpakstan, creating unprecedented cross-regional collaboration opportunities. A certification program provides official certificates valuable for scholarship applications, while a talent registry creates a “Talented Girls List” for ongoing support and project tracking.

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SDG - 17ta dunyoni o'zgartirishga yo'naltirilgan Barqaror Rivojlanish  Maqsadlari

Addressing Global Sustainability Goals

The forum directly advances multiple United Nations Sustainable Development Goals, primarily SDG 4 (Quality Education) and SDG 5 (Gender Equality). “Research shows that when women lead, there is significant positive impact on students’ academic performance and overall well-being,”. “Our empowered participants will contribute to educational excellence in their communities.”

The project also connects to SDG 8 (Decent Work and Economic Growth) through entrepreneurship training, SDG 10 (Reduced Inequalities) by providing equal opportunities across different regions, and SDG 17 (Partnerships for the Goals) through international networking and collaboration opportunities.

Measuring Real Impact

The forum’s success is measured through both quantitative and qualitative metrics. All 150 participants completed the program and received certificates, achieving a 100% completion rate. More importantly, the project tracks long-term outcomes including scholarship applications, career advancement, and startup initiatives launched by participants.

Success benchmarks are ambitious yet achievable: Year one targets 90% participant satisfaction with 50% pursuing new opportunities and establishment of an active alumni network. By year two, the program aims to expand to 300+ participants with secured international partnerships. Year three envisions regional recognition as the premier women’s leadership platform with a 500+ alumni network and measurable SDG impact in participant communities.Mentalaba - Universitet haqida batafsil
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Building Sustainable Networks

The forum’s vision extends far beyond a single event. To establish EmpowerHer as the premier leadership development platform for young women in Central Asia, creating a generation of confident, skilled, and internationally connected female leaders who drive sustainable development in their communities.

The EmpowerHer forum represents more than professional development—it embodies a fundamental shift toward gender equality and sustainable progress. As these 150 young women leaders return to their communities armed with new skills, networks, and confidence, they carry with them the potential to transform not just their own futures, but the trajectory of Central Asia’s development.

Through partnerships with the Uzbekistan Youth Union Samarkand Provincial Council and Samarkand State Institute of Foreign Languages, with future collaboration planned with the Uzbekistan Volunteer Association, EmpowerHer demonstrates that sustainable change requires comprehensive, culturally-sensitive approaches to women’s empowerment. The revolution in female leadership has begun, one empowered woman at a time.

Short story from Bill Tope

Zest

Previously published in Down in the Dirt Magazine

“Hello, Deb,” said the tall man softly. He approached the 22-year-old, ironically, she thought, in the produce section at the supermarket.
Deb looked up, her hand poised over the navel oranges, her mother’s favorite. She didn’t recognize him at first; he had changed: more gray, a few additional pounds and the clothing was vastly different. When last she’d seen John Bowen, he had effected a more rustic look: plaid flannel shirts and washed out jeans and coarse work boots. A studied, rugged persona better suited to ensnaring young lovers, she thought testily. But now, he was every bit the young professional: dress slacks, fancy shoes and a blazer that probably cost more than the car she drove. He also sported some exotic cologne.


“How’ve you been?” asked John.
Deb narrowed her eyes at him. “What’s it to you?” she asked frostily. Deb had been one of John’s many sexual conquests, if only for a weekend. But that was the least of it.
John lowered his eyes for a moment, for effect, thought Deb. “You’ve a right to feel that way,” he said.


“You have no idea how I feel,” she said. “How could you? You booked the moment you got my mother pregnant. Off to scale new heights, make a name for yourself; the woman you impregnated–and your child–be damned! You never called–not once!” She seethed.
John looked around uneasily. “Keep it down, will you?” he asked.
“Why?” she asked, just as loudly.
“I’m back in the area,” he explained, “on business. I can’t afford a scene. I have a reputation to uphold, you see.”
“Is that supposed to interest me somehow?” Deb asked.


“Maybe not,” he admitted. He’d try a different tack. “How’s Beth–and the baby?”
“They’re doing fine–without you!” said Deb fiercely.
“I’d like to see them.” There, he’d said it.
This drew Deb up short. As much as she detested John Bowen for what he did to her family, who was she to say that he could learn nothing of his own child? She felt torn.


As if sensing her indecision, John said, “Can I see them?”
She reached a decision. “Let me talk to Mom,” she told him.
He smiled. “Great.”
She frowned back at him. “No,” she said. “Not great. I’ll always hate you for what you did to Mom, but I’m big enough to get over myself and see if she wants to talk to you about your child.”
John nodded. “Good enough.”


Reflexively pulling out their respective cell phones, they exchanged numbers and email addresses. That done, Deb turned away, plunked a couple of navel oranges into her cart and wheeled off in the opposite direction without another word. She didn’t look back.
John watched her disappear down the aisle.
– – –
Two nights later, Deb received a call on her cell. She saw the caller ID and frowned.
“Yes?” she said.
“Hi, Deb,” said John. “I wondered if you’d had a chance to speak to Beth.”
“Not yet,” she said tersely, and nothing more.
After a moment, John said, “Well, when will you do it?”
“I’ll do it when I do it,” she snapped, then glanced at Beth, who was cooking dinner. Her mother looked up at Deb’s sharp tone, but said nothing. Deb was always arguing with her boyfriend nowadays. Beth shrugged and stirred the pot.


“I’ll call you,” said Deb. “Yes, tomorrow.” She disconnected.
“More problems with Brian?” asked Beth solicitously.
Deb drew a blank for an instant and then said, “Yeah, same old same old.”
After dinner, and a shower for Deb, mother and daughter sat on the sofa, sipping coffee. Deb continued to struggle with her dilemma.
Suddenly Beth spoke up, “Are you ready to tell me now, Baby?”
Deb looked up in surprise. “Tell you what?” she asked.
“About that mysterious phone call you got before dinner.”
“I told you it was…”
Beth interrupted, “Brian called while you were in the shower. Told me he couldn’t get through on your cell. He was impatient, said he had to speak with you.”


“Oh,” said Deb.
“Baby,” said Beth, “are you seeing another man on the side?”
“What!” exclaimed Deb.
“You were furtive over the phone, and I thought…”
“No, Mom, I’m not seeing anyone behind Brian’s back,” she assured her. “How could you even think that? You know you and Dad didn’t raise me like that.”
At the mention of her late husband, Beth smiled tenderly. She had been feeling awfully lonely lately. She sighed.


“Are you alright, Mom?” Deb asked.
“Never mind me,” said Beth. “Who were you talking to?”
Deb made up her mind to come clean. Honesty had always been the glue that held their family together. “I ran into John,” she said.
Beth froze in place and replaced her cup on the saucer with a little click. “Where?” she asked.
“Kroger,” replied Deb. “In the produce section,” she added.


Catching the irony at once, Beth twisted her lips and said, “You didn’t spill any fruit, did you?” Beth had first met John at the grocery when, shackled to a walker following the automobile accident that had taken her husband, she spilled the oranges and John retrieved them. Later, when John became a student in Deb’s writing group, they became better acquainted.
“No,” replied Deb.
“Did he…” began Beth.
“He asked about you,” said Deb. “And the baby.”
“So he knows…”


“He only knows that you gave birth to a child. I didn’t go into any details. I thought I’d leave that to you.”
“What did you tell him?” asked Beth.
“I told him I’d talk to you and then get back to him tomorrow.”
“Give me his number, Deb, and I’ll call him.”
“Mom…”
“I can handle it, Baby. It should come from me.”
– – –
The next evening, at the tentative knock at the door, Beth, cane in hand, walked cautiously across the living room and opened the door. There stood John, dressed to kill, looking otherwise just as Beth remembered him.
“Hello, John,” she said, her mind irresistibly drawn to the one night of intimacy they’d shared so long ago. She had thought it might lead to something, but it never did.
John stared at her. “Beth, what happened? You’re walking on your own now!” he said happily.


Beth permitted herself a little smile at his apparent joy. “I had surgery, actually two surgeries,” she told him. “Almost a year ago.”
“Well, you look wonderful,” he went on, smiling broadly.
“Come in,” she invited, remembering her manners. Beth had thought about John all night, the good memories as well as the bleak, and hadn’t decided yet how to receive him. Now she thought she would play it by ear, see where his head was at. “Sit down,” she told him, leading the way to the sofa. Where John had first kissed her, nearly three years before. It seemed a lifetime ago now.


“Can I get you anything, John?” she asked, always the genial host.
“I’m good.”
They sat awkwardly, John staring at his shoes and Beth gazing about the living room. At length, John said, “You had a child.”
Beth stared into his blue eyes; eyes she’d fallen in love with. “Yes,” she said, “I named him Kevin, after my father.” Why had he come? she wondered. He had moved on, as had she. Or had she? John was still handsome, she thought.


“It’s a good name,” remarked John agreeably. “Is he here? Could I see him?” he asked.
“Kevin is away,” she said hesitantly. “With my parents.”
John nodded. “Where do they live, Beth?”
“They’re in Michigan,” she replied.
“Is that where you’re from?” John asked.
“Yes.”
“When will he return home, Beth? I’d really like to finally meet him.”


“Why did it take years to kindle your interest, John?” she asked, bristling with suspicion at his sudden interest.
“I…I don’t know, I was in school, you know, and then I had to get my license and find a job.”
“And did you accomplish all that?” she asked archly.
“Yes,” he said slowly, mindful of her bantering tone. “I work for Boeing, in Seattle, and it looks like my career is set.”
“Good for you, John,” said Beth neutrally.


“Look, Beth,” said John, “I know you must have mixed feelings about our relationship, about what went down 3 years ago and how it ended…”
“You’re right about that, John,” agreed Beth. “It did end.”
John stopped talking.
“Why are you here, John?” she asked. “I know it has nothing to do with me. And I have a hard time believing you woke up one day to find yourself teeming with parental concern. Why are you here?” she repeated.


“Alright,” he said, “I’ll tell you. I’m married now. To a wonderful girl.” He regarded Beth, but she seemed strangely indifferent. He knew she’d fallen hard for him, but now she seemed so detached. He shook his head to clear it. “We have a perfect marriage, but for one thing: she can’t have children. And she wants kids.”
He looked into Beth’s eyes again, but saw nothing.
“So you thought,” said Beth, “that you had the perfect solution. You had a ready-made family waiting for her here in Chicago. Given your MO, it’s possibly you have many such children sprinkled throughout Illinois,” she went on sarcastically.


“Suzanne,” said John, referencing his wife, “is a well-regarded attorney. She has political connections, too. She can make things happen.”
“Things like the rapid, no-questions-asked adoption of a child?” suggested Beth.
“That’s right. I’ll put it to you, Beth: even with a cane, you can barely get around; nothing’s changed, really. Raising a child has to be a monumental burden for you. We’ll give you $1 million to agree to the adoption and to permanently waive all custody rights.”
“I love both my children!” said Beth vehemently. “I always will.”
“I know that,” said John. “But, let’s be reasonable, Beth. You’ve spent your whole life raising children and financially living on the edge. Take the money…”


“And run?” she asked sardonically.
“Would you at least think about it and consider what this could mean for you and Deb? Kevin would want for nothing: the best schools, the…”
“I don’t need to think about it, John,” she told him, interrupting.
“Then your answer is no?” he asked, frowning ominously.
“My answer,” she said, “is yes.”
“What?” he asked, “Just like that?”
“Just like that. But, you’ll have to go to Michigan to pick him up.”
“Give me the address,” he said, pulling out his cell. ‘You’ll need to call your folks and clear it.”


“That won’t be possible,” said Beth.
When he looked up, she said, “No service.”
Before John could ask any additional questions or make any more demands, Beth came clean. “Kevin suffered Sudden Infant Death Syndrome, John, SIDS, at 5 months. No reason for it, really. Sometimes it just happens. That’s what they told me, the social workers and the doctors.”
John stared at her, aghast. “But, you said Kevin was with your parents in Michigan.” he protested.
“My parents passed away years ago. Our family vault is in Michigan, in Millwood Cemetery. Google it,” she suggested coldly.
– – –
Hours later, when Deb had returned from her date, Beth was sitting on the sofa, a glass of sangria on the coffee table before her. Deb approached her cautiously and said quietly, “Did you tell him?”
Beth looked up sadly and nodded. “I told him that your brother Kevin died at 5 months of crib death. That he’s buried in Michigan in the family vault alongside your grandparents.”


“Mom,” said Deb gently.
Beth looked up.
“Who the hell is Kevin?”
Beth smiled.
“And grandma and grandpa aren’t dead! Ooh!” she said. “You did a number on him.”
“Who knows,” said Beth, “there’s apt to be a Kevin interred in a crypt somewhere in Michigan. But I don’t think that John will hang around the Midwest long enough to find out. He’ll be making other plans.”
“Won’t he be able to check the web to see the names aren’t the same?” asked Deb.


“Your sister’s middle initial is K, remember; close enough. And I’m thinking that the shock will knock him for a loop. Besides, you can’t trust the internet on anything. And so what if they do find out the truth? Screw ’em. They want a young child. Annie will be too old for them by the time we’re through with the courts. Besides, your grandma is a pretty damn good lawyer herself.”


Deb decided to change the subject. “When are grandma and grandpa bringing Annie back from L.A.?” she asked.
“Saturday,” replied Beth. “Their plane is landing at Midway Airport at 9am. I can hardly wait to hold your sister again!”
“Now,” said Deb, taking a seat, “tell me the whole story.”
Beth did.