When I was growing up, a common dairy advertising jingle on the radio went, ‘Cows in Berkeley? Moooo.’

There may not be many cows around the Oakland and Berkeley area, yet there are several people involved with creating cheese at North Oakland’s Counter Culture Labs.

According to the Water Footprint Network, a global group of researchers and professionals dedicated to analyzing the world’s water use, a pound of cheese requires 381 gallons of water to produce.

Even after the Bay Area’s rainy winter, many people recognize that our state is prone to droughts. So molecular biologist Craig Rouskey and others are developing cheeses less reliant on heavy water use.

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Sam Against Time

By Mike Zone

Samuel K. Drexel stood in the hallway, facing down two doors on the second floor of the locally esteemed and moderately priced Cauliflower Hotel. Neurons bouncing around his brain like a wild pinball, trying to determine which room his wife had entered with Coach McMurphy.

Asymmetrical beads of sweat decorated half his boyish face of cut sharp fine features almost like a lady but not quite, having an Adam’s apple and all, he pondered that as he bit into his feminine lower lip but the moisture soaking into his light brown lanky hair snapped him out of it, forcing back into his calculations, factoring variable to no avail determining whether the couple had entered behind Red Door #206 or 208.

Christ, McMurphy! Coach Nicholson McMurphy. How typical, the high school football coach, former semi-pro football player turned philosophy teacher who didn’t know a thing about philosophy; stealing the math teacher’s wife. The kids would be posting this all over FaceBook, tweeting memes or whatever they instagramed; as their parents fondly reflected on the teen McMurphy and Drexel years, in which the same thing happened at least twice a year with Samuel Drexel winding up drenched in toilet water, missing his belt and one shoe but brandishing two black eyes to make up for the lack of accessories.

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Designed to Love You

I was designed to love you, but —

Betrayal arrived with my first breath;

I committed treason on a cosmic scale

And for that I must be put to death.

I was designed to love you —

Molded clay from which I stand,

But I destroyed your masterpiece —

From Paradise to a wasteland.

I was designed to love you,

So I worked to gain your favor,

Then I carved gold into a calf

And glorified in all my labor.

I was designed to love you,

But I left you like a prostitute,

And wallowed with the swine

Until I was stubbornly destitute.

I was designed to love you

But I spat slander in your face,

Pounded the nails into your hands

And disregarded your embrace.

I was designed to love you, and —

Although you drew me to your waters

And I followed you out of the boat,

I denied you over, and over, and over …

A mystery from the beginning:

I was blind to your eternal view,

But because you loved me first

I am redesigned to love you!

Megastar

Mega, he’s a star in the sky

Not a screen shines silver where

Appears a star that dwelling apart

No Angels dare to tread, this

Celestial omnibus a master performer

Conceals artifice his art a proof

Of the theory of acting, best device

A prolific actor has talent eloquent

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Spiral

Straight lines and grid-work

can’t define Me.

I know all the angles

and bend them ’round.

I hide that little bit of lightning

beneath My peppery tongue,

and when I lose My patience,

I use it!

Don’t push Me.

When I cut straight to the point,

the point goes up in smoke.

Better to let Me

come about in My own way.

There’s nothing about Me

you can nail down,

put in a box,

bend to your own purpose.

I bend you.

When you call My name,

remember that.

Let yourself flap like a flag in My wind.

Let your tongue go slack,

and speak My tongues!

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